Another reset had special personal anniversarys of the death of loved ones ! Turn to drink Again ! My marriage is involved in major binge drinking Ive had enough I try to Express myself to my husband but cant no were I can only do this myself with the support of groups and this app !my life is a complete mess ! Im gaining weight by the wk and feel a mess ! Relationship with children is suffering & half the time i would rather just crawl into a hole ! My self confidence has completely gone & my depression and anxiety are in a really bad way !when i dont drink im fresh and feel amazing !
@Rainbow82. I’m in the same situation. It’s 6 am and my husband has already poured his glass of morning wine. I’ve stayed sober 16 days. You have to do it for you. Be so so selfish. It’s hard when you always have access. I could drink at any time, it’s always here. As I watch my husband get wasted every single day. Lately he’s controlled it better. Not getting belligerent, but drinking abnormally the same. My youngest moved in with his father 2 months ago because my house is just toxic. It sucks. Stay sober today.only today. Let the shame the shame of the relapse pass. Forgive yourself. I’m her if you have any triggers.
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Sometimes we have to change everything. I had two older sisters (nasty negative people) that drank all the time and I was kinda bought up to be the same… I really wanted to stop just like you but by then it felt impossible. But one day I thought you know what? I’ve got to do this for me, otherwise I’m going to die young. I felt just as you describe…so I cut out the people that were heavy drinkers in my life and changed my life drastically. A saying that sticks with me that spurred me on in the beginning was… NOTHING CHANGES IF NOTHING CHANGES! If we want sobriety we really have to make it happen. It’s hard I know. I’m sending you strength and I hope you feel better soon. 
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Thank you so nice to hear ur all understanding! Hes said to me that you really need stop drinking cause ur nasty and im the reason he storms off to pub ! Sick of being blamed for his actions ! Then when i dont drink and do well he says just have a drink & calls me boring !, I cant win but im going to win the situation myself with the help of my mind & me
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We’re here for you on your journey. You just need to focus on you and get sober for you because you want to. It is hard, I never thought I could stop or be able to sit with others whilst they are drinking but it is possible, I promise! Have you read The easy way to stop drinking by Allen Carr. It is a very good book and well worth a read. There is an easy way book for women too that tells you why you are as stuck as you are. I have it on my kindle and read it when I’m struggling. Also, write yourself a letter telling yourself how you are feeling right now…all of the depression and self loathing that’s going on right now we forget when we’ve been sober for a bit. It really helped me to write that letter. I have been sober now for 5 days off a year and have only had to read my letter once, last month. I cried at what I’d written. It stopped any thoughts of ‘just one glass’ straight away. Reach out anytime friend
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Thank you for your help
Managed a shower my depression so bad today Im just laying in bed 
Hopefully tomorrow i will make plans to get dressed taking this one day at a time