I started my sobriety last January 17 of this year. It’s one of my many tries and it’s quite challenging because I live in an environment where alcohol is occasionally encouraged for consumption such as gatherings and parties and I work a job where I’m surrounded by it. The more challenging part is the home environment because I don’t feel entirely safe emotionally here from relatives who are very judgmental and scrutinizing. It doesn’t help that two of them, my uncle and cousin, are big on micromanaging a lot and it doesn’t help that although I am of their blood I am still an outsider considering I am not part of their nuclear family.
I know that they use alcohol as a way to cunningly make me open up while through the use of informative questions as was also observed by a concerned family member who is my father then use whatever they have gathered against me either by twisting my words, putting words in my mouth, wrongfully assuming things, to name some. I also dislike how I start to reach for alcohol whenever I am unable to tolerate my emotional pain just to help me sleep and get through tense days.
I am currently trying to become financially stable, gather skills and experiences at multiple jobs, heal and grow, and become more independent while handling personal matters so moving out is a complicated subject at the moment. I am grateful for my relatives’ good side too as they are not inherently bad because they provide some basic necessities they share with me so in turn I share back and give gratitude. I’d like to believe that they simply have different personalities and are going through personal struggles themselves to be this way aside from whatever other factors there may be.
I want to be better and to do better so I decided to refrain from using it and resuming my abstinence.
For further context: Many years ago I lost an aunt to liver disease from chronic alcoholism and there are other relatives who are alcoholics and smokers too. It’s normalized in my father’s side of the family, the side that I share with the relatives I live with which makes them fully aware of the harm it brings and the tragedy that happened. I grew up mostly protected from these influences but over time I picked it up myself to cope through depression and anxiety.
Welcome Kat
Congrats on your sober time and starting a new life without alcohol.
Being in an environment like that will definitely make it difficult to be sober. But it can be done.
This is a great sober community to have in your pocket to check in and make sober friends and help get and give support. There’s a great daily checkin thread lots of people use
Have a good read around. Join in when you’re comfortable.
AA meetings and Al-Anon meetings helped me tremendously.
Welcome and great start on the sobriety. It sounds like you are identifying triggers. Now is the time to gain sober tools to help you navigate the uncomfortable emotions. It takes time and practice but it is possible. Stick with it because you are worth it
Hiya everyone im only a couple of days into my learning to live without drinking alcohol i was drinking nearly every night. I am also suffering from itchy skin ive read other people’s problems with it so at least I know im not the only one. I am determined to do this i just keep singing the song one day at a time to myself to spur me on. Ive loved reading people’s posts.
Welcome to TS and well done on your sober time Kat, sounds like you have a lot to deal with so great you’ve recognised this area of your life that needs to take a new path. Stay strong, have a good read around on here and know that you’re never alone
Every day a little win reading my book love yourself sober is helping it’s the dreaded weekend to get over now child minding until tomorrow so that’s a help and going to spring clean all weekend lol x
