Hello ! Im new here :)

Hello! im so glad I found this app & im so happy because I feel like it will help me to finally be able to stay sober . I am tired of the hangxiety , the depression & everything that comes with drinking . I am a mother aswell , so everytime i drink i feel like a failure . I dont know how i got to this point , started with a glass of wine here and there to emptying full bottles daily . I try to stay over but always relapse after a couple days . I want to do this , i want to be happy sober again . I miss the old me , I need her back & I have faith that I will get her back someday. I am so proud of everyone here :heart:

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Welcome to TS!

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Welcome! So glad you’re here. You sound very similar to me, but it feels extra good to do this when you have kids. They motivate me to keep going. I think I used wine as an excuse as something that I thought made me relax and feel like I was having “me time” in the evenings but it spiralled from a few glasses to a bottle (and sometimes more) pretty much every night and I felt awful both physically & emotionally. It is addictive for sure. I’m new here too and everyone is so supportive and has the best advice, they are much wiser than me, but I just wanted to say welcome! :slightly_smiling_face:

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Thank you so much ! thats exactly how i felt and feel now , I try to make things feel better and use the excuse that i drink after my kid goes to bed , just typical alcohol excuse "If he doesnt see its okay right " - but the next day it all hits , i drive to work in the mornings and sit in my car before feeling like I am a failure , to him & to myself . I am only 3 days sober (this time , because i have relapsed so many times ) & i dont want to fail again . & also im so proud of you & thank you for replying to my post :slight_smile:

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thank you for welcoming me :heart:

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Warm welcome to the community. :hugs::purple_heart: You are definitely not a failure. I look at your attitude regarding getting sober and staying that way, and I see that you’re already off to a great start. Consistent but small steps, one minute or hour or day at a time… every day sober is a milestone for me. I’m so happy you’re here. :blush:

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Thank you so much for your kind words :heart:🥲

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Welcome! This is a great step! Be active, it will help you on your journey!

Welcome @Bee1544.

Copy n paste time…other will recognise this. I send this for anyone in the 1st few days in the hope they find something helpful in it. A list I compiled with the help of other people with alcohol problems. Take from it anything that helps:

Welcome Well done for choosing sobriety.
Here’s a list of tips I’ve put together with the help of other friends on this path. Take from it anything that helps. Above all, stay here…we will help you. You’re in our boat now…the same boat we’re all in. Hope this helps:

1 Read Alcohol Explained by William Porter (you can get audio version from audible)
2 Go to as many aa meetings as you can. Listen, share if you feel OK to, engage, get phone numbers
3 Get busy. Housework, exercise, new hobby, gardening, baking, YouTube rapping, movies…anything. Don’t leave yourself any free time.
4 Be honest with yourself. Why are you stopping, how do you feel…
5 Read Alcohol Explained 2
6 stick to your decision to quit and never doubt or question it. You got it right.
7 If you do ever wobble or get tempted, ask yourself one simple question… What will it add? Will it make a good situation better? Will it make a bad situation better. My years of frequent horrid experiences have shown for me, the answer is it adds nothing and makes nothing better.
8 Stay here, keep reaching out, use your peers’ support and experience
9 help others as soon as you feel you can, even in the very early days. I’m only 13 days and honestly it’s helping me to help you. I can reread my advice to you and then reapply it to my own situation
10 Pray. Doesn’t matter if your not religious or don’t know who or what you’re praying to - I don’t, I could be praying to myself. But I’ve found over the past fortnight that getting on my knees, asking (out loud) for strength, asking for a sober day and then giving thanks for that strength and sobriety has felt extremely empowering.
EDIT: 11-14 thank you to Facebook friends:

11 Look for the fun in the journey!
12 Every day pay attention to what is improving. Even the little things, like being able to remember someone’s name after being introduced.
13. Make self care a priority; find the things that you can do to make yourself feel pampered and that will destress you in a healthy way.
14. Learn to identify and change your negative self talk.

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today is day 3 actually , the most ive been able to do is 2 weeks then usually relapsed … trying to finally beat this :frowning:

thank you for this ! :slight_smile:

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Welcome :heart:

Hangxiety is a brilliant word. I think a lot of is have been there!

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Welcome! I’m fairly new too, joined about 10 days ago after too many relapses. Everyone here is so nice and supportive! I’m in a similar boat, I keep relapsing and can’t seem to make it longer than about 3 weeks. Community is so important, checking in here every few days has helped keep me accountable and motivated. I hope it does the same for you :blossom:

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Im a relapser as well and a parent. I e gone anywhere from two days to six months sober. And I used this tracker but I never realized there was a group page to get support and encouragement. This page is making a huge difference for me in addition to meetings. We cannot do this on our own - we need community. A new friend suggested I read William Porter’s Alcohol Explained and it is life changing! Youve got this!

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Welcome Bee
I got a cat named B. Beatrix.
Sorry. Welcome to this great sober community. Lots of great people here to help us on our sober journey.
Congratulations on day 3. Have a good read around and join in when your willing.

Advice for new comers and constant relapsers

@Michaelsean82
@Amawat88
:pray::heart:

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Im on the same boat , but im proud of us for not giving up , we can do this :heart:

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I saw many people talking about that book, i must get it now :slight_smile:

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Hi! Am also a mother so I know exactly how you feel, it’s hard very hard am only at day 3 and I really want to stay sober, you can do it and this forum really has been helping me everyone here understands and has kind words. Just keep focusing on your child I know it’s easier said then done because I been an alcoholic for years my parents were too I always said I wouldn’t be like them and here I am. My husband also left me so it’s making it a harder journey because he left for worst not for better I guess I did this it’s all my fault. But we can be strong just try to think about the positive and how wonderful of a human being you are. God is great and he will always be here for us even when we can’t even believe that. Keep on with this forum because not only will others help but in a sense you also will get something back in return just by also trying to help others that are here.

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Thank you for your kind words , & im sorry for all the hard things going on. Im here if you ever need someone to talk to , im proud of you :heart: