Help! Alcohol mum now gambling and blackmailing me

[Majiek]

I’m currently staying at my mums

she’s got a gambling and alcohol addiction.. alcohol first but since my Nan died January last year it’s now gambling too so 2 addictions.. it’s too much for me because I’m Also autistic and because the gambling loss will always lead back to alcohol.. I try and explain this and she promises to stop but she doesn’t listen to me which makes me upset

she’s threatening to phone the police on me her own son to get my arrested for assault if I don’t give her money for gambling when I don’t have a criminal Record and can’t afford to get one because of jobs.. she think she can gamble all her money away each month and I should bail her out by paying her bills etc and I can’t afford to do it and why should I every month? I’ve done it too many times the softy soft approach maybe tough life is now my only option? Cut her off, get a new SIM card etc because she’s PURE EVIL towards me.. I use to have my Nan to help share the load but now she’s dead I’ve got nobody to talk to and help me she tries to make out I’m in the wrong and turning it on me

what do I do in this situation? Even if I leave she might still call the police and because I’m a man they will take her accusation seriously and arrest me etc even though I’ve done nothing wrong and she has these addictions which turn her pure NASTY and EVIL (and they know that it’s on her records)

I’ve been dealing with her binge drinking for 15-20 years most sons would have disowned her by now.. but I’m too soft and because of my autism I don’t have many other people in my life

She’s already got me arrested twice for fake accusations which means my DNA, picture etc was taken without me deserving it

[Kjcj]

Wow, you’re in a really difficult situation, I’m sorry. Have you considered Al-Anon meetings? They might be good support for you. Hang in there.

[Majiek]

I’ll try but at the minute just need some immediate advice in how to deal with this situation before starting to heal

Thanks for your kind words

[erntedank]

Welcome back @Majiek
I repeat what I said the last times you came here with the same situation: Get your ass out of there, you can’t control others, take care of yourself, draw firm boundaries and get therapy for your codependency.

How To Get Mum Sectioned for Mental Health?

you repeat the pattern, you asked for before. so given advice is the same. stop enabling, get your focus on yourself, call ambulance/police and stop interacting. you don’t want to do that. that’s your choice. no, you won’t hear anything else to support your own codependent party you refuse to step out. get help for yourself and control your own life. yes it hurts and worries. nothing you can do about it.

How To Get Mum Sectioned for Mental Health?

Why you listen? You already got advice: let it be and focus on yourself. her drinking is nothing you can do about. you don’t want to change, you want to stay where you are and rant about it.

How To Get Mum Sectioned for Mental Health?

You have to focus and work on yourself. As previously said the addiction of your mother is not your business nor can you do anything about it, let alone control it or force her to act in a certain way, decide something on her behalf or help her. What you are sharing about yourself reminds me partly of myself. Wanting the sober version of a loved one, worrying about the fuckup the person causes when drinking. Fact is, detachment, hard boundaries and distancing from the drunken drama AND your ow…

My Mum is an alcoholic I'm at my wits end help!

Get out there, stay at your own home, block her and let the universe care. Your health comes first. No need to talk to her, you are talking to the bottle when she is drunk. Tough love, yes, tell her she is an abusive asshole while drunk - when she is sober and not hungover so she can get the message if she wants. nothing you can do about her. take care about yourself. if you focus on her drinking, you neglect your needs for sober connection and loose focus on your own health. very bad idea w…