Im trying to seek treatment as in therapy and other ways of getting my mind to relax, I’m looking into healthy supplements. It’s hard, I cry. I feel like it’s affected me much more than I realize. I’m trying to work myself through it but I feel so hopeless at times, I absolutely love it when it doesn’t come through my mind, me wanting to vape is an issue. But I also realize I have major mom/dad trauma that I’ve been keeping away with distractions and drug use. I’m trying to open up to my dad today and I think my mom will be there too…I’m just scared because I feel like I failed them for 30 years over and over. I shake as I write this because I feel like myself right now. I feel like I’m split myself and I can’t find myself, I don’t mean to sound so depressing or anything. This is how I feel right now, I want the thoughts of quitting to end, I want the thoughts of smoking to end, I never wanted a peace of mind so badly. Having dept is a killer for me. I’m reading the post of people feeling happier quitting but idk why in my heart and mind it doesn’t feel real or registering as a person who went through the same or worse. I worry about my sexual health more now. Im constantly fighting myself in my head, I know I’m a mess but I’m trying. I’m really trying but my efforts feel so small compared to everyone else.
1 Like
Your efforts and experiences are your own; nobody is judging, but we are all supporting you as you try to overcome the difficulties and find a way forward that will bring out your best and happiest life. It’s not easy, but nothing worth having was easy - right?
You can do it - we’re with you!!
1 Like
Focus on the good and the good gets better is a quote I like a lot. So focus on your efforts and do not compare yourself with others. You have your own path to follow, as I have mine.
You are trying and making steps, that’s great!
1 Like