Keep coming to keep going. Best you can do for your kids.
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I just saw this post now but I want you to know I can totally relate. I tried so hard to tell myself I didn’t really have a problem. But then hiding drinks and sneaking drinks- I can totally relate. The one thing that really made me take a deep hard look at myself was after I straight out lied to my daughter when she asked if I had been drinking. I said no, as I stumbled to the counter after drinking 7 shots of gin in about an an hour.
I’m glad your here. You are not alone.
We are stronger together.
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Thanks again for all the words of encouragement, advice and support. I am currently 1 week without a drink and my anxiety has gone down quite a bit! I am really enjoying not having a hangover on a Sunday morning! I’ll be on here regularly so I don’t get complacent with my progress!
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Congratulations on 1 week, that was definitely the hardest part for me. By 2 weeks all of the really tough symptoms were over, including bad sleep and anxiety.
Looking forward to seeing you around here 
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Everyone has good advice, but its finding your path that will work ,for me it was finally accepted im a alcoholic, stopped questioning why and just accepted it ,for years i was telling people i could trust bits about how bad it was but i never really wanted to give up just knew i had real bad issues with saying no to alcohol, ive been to aa done a detox read the big book and many more ,watched life stories about how alcohol destroyed peoples lifes but i still didnt stop ,i had a bad run up to the new year and decided i couldn’t go on not another year 20 days i lasted then i had a 4 day bender, i sobered up felt everything you are feeling despair anxiety it was terrible, id let myself down again with promises i thought i could keep ,i got back on the straight and narrow again now in 23 days ,i think the change for me was i personally always knew i was lying to myself i alway thought i can sort myself out and drink socially again ,but i cant ,i crossed a line and theres no going back not for me ,im happier now ,and believe me i never ever thought i could do it ,but i have ,everyone has found different ways took different paths ,i could have watched and read everything even aa but until i was honest with myself i knew i was never going to do it ,ive accepted it now ,the first week was hard but if you push through you can find you can live your life without it ,you will find away if you really want it thats why we are all here ,sometimes you fall down just pick yourself back up and try again if you really want it you will do it ,good luck
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This really resonates with me, although I never hid drink myself, I never had to because my drinking was at home and alone… However growing up, my dad had an alcohol problem that he denied.
He thought he hid it, but he really didn’t. He’d go into the garage and chug rancid cider. If you asked him if he was drinking he’d say no, but then you’d hear another can open. Or see the drink. See him or smell him.
He’d also go upstairs, you’d hear the draw open and close, then a can opening. Then he’d come back downstairs.
I don’t believe there are any secret drinkers out there, the only people who don’t know it are themselves.
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