How many times did you have to start over after relapsing? How did you feel? I was almost a month sober and I had my first drink the other dayâŚ.i felt disappointed in myselfâŚ.but Iâm starting over again 
and Iâll do it again if I have toâŚ..
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I lost count.
My first real attempt was back in 2013. My wife had left me when she was pregnant with our first. I told her I was gonna change. I stayed sober for 2 months and went back to drinking. I thought 2 months was enough and thought I could moderate. It was an up an down roller coaster eversince. I kept trying. Made it to a week, 2 weeks, 30 days, 60 days, 90, and 6 months was my longest streak, but I kept failing. Anyway, hit rock bottom in 2021 and got tired of the bullshit.
I found this community in February 2022. Stayed connected, and Iâve been sober for 4 yrs and 8 months now.
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I seriously have lost count to be honest. Ive struggled with addiction for 22 years before it finally âclickedâ. And now i have 4+ years in 
i think tho whats important is that u keep trying. Learn from the relapse, bcuz thereâs usually alot of information that can be gained when looking back at what happened. Relapses rarely just happen immediately. They begin before the actual act of picking up. There are signs that occur days or weeks prior that sort of let us know that we are leading to disaster, unless we do something about it. Looking back at what happened for u, could u potentially see some âsignsâ prior to that drink?
Try not to be too hard on urself tho. I know its upsetting but just get right back up and develop a plan of action for next time And if it helps, come on here BEFORE u pick up. Let us help u thru the craving.
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Iâm on my 3rd reset since April, I think the main thing is keep trying and be accountable for the decisions we make. Ima rough restring the clock but one day at a time
Weâve got this 
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I easily reset over a hundred times in my first 2.5 years of effort. I felt discouraged, disappointed, abandoned by society and selfâŚ
It takes what it takes. For me it took an ongoing commitment to trying to achieve sobriety, mental health support, medication, a lot of moving away from toxic environments, support from an unconditionally loving little girl, an understanding judge and probation officer, and the right AA homegroup. I found that out through experimentation and a process of elimination. The path isnât always clear for everyone. If you keep waking up youâve got a other day to work with. I didnât have a great attitude all the days along the way and I wonât pretend I did but I kept showing up for myself and I eventually got some traction.
In hindsight⌠I see a lot that I coul nât before I had multiple sober years to clarify my view. Imagine there are extenuating and mitigating circumstances affecting you that might matter a lot to your effort. In sobriety I have found out all kinds of relevant medical and legal things that impacted my quality of life and my desire to escape it for oblivion that make my desire to drink make a lot more sense. When you can be sober long enough to do the bitch work of your life that you couldnât do or understand when you were using, it will make a lot more sense and you can be proud of the version of yourself you are right now for just waking up and trying to start over again and again on what seems to be a thankless task. Your future self will be thankful for what you presently find thankless. Like, would you punish yourself for having an autoimmune condition you donât know you have? A neurodiverse diagnosis? Oppression of your civil rights? Some of those things (or similarly problematic things) could be apply to you and you not know it right now except that you hate your life and sobriety for reasons you canât identify or define yet. And thatâs ok. We live one day at a time and if we keep coming back more will be revealed.
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Maybe try a meeting might help you on your journey , im fortunate i havnt experienced a relapse yet just did what i was told and made the effort good network and foundation helped wish you well
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Twice in a pretty short period. I made it 8 months without drinking, but the last 4 of that I thought weed would be ok. Turns out it wasnât and I drank anyway after a really hard mental time and then I went like another month and then back to it again. Thankfully in October of 2024 I finally committed to my program and thatâs been it for me as of now. Early on especially I think itâs really good to make connections with good sober people and really put your full effort into recovery. Thatâs why meetings are such a good thing. You meet people and you can get involved with stuff
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Ummm, this is either gonna be weird or make a ton of sense, but are you THE C-sun?
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The very villain.
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We ride at dawn
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If we only count the times when I had finally realised I had to be completely sober, and relapsed from that, 3 or 4. If you mean getting too drunk when I was planning to drink moderately, dozens if not hundreds. I felt absolutely shameful, and broken, and tired. But all you can do is pick yourself and try again, and try adding something to your plan.
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