I have been an addict my whole life. Even when I was just a little girl ad addicted to Barbie’s. My laitest addiction was too meth. I am 34 days off of it. In a matter of months I lost my house, my kids, my sanity, and almost my life. In the last 34 days I have accomplished more then the whole time I was on it. I used because I never thought I had enough time to complete everything I wanted to I thought by using I could stay awake longer and have more energy to provide for my kids. Turns out while I was rushing I was losing. It turns out living life slowly and being okay with not getting things done is much more enjoyable and healthy your kids don’t need you to make sure you don’t forget to pack that extra little cookie and note in their lunch box but instead they need to be able to hear I love you at the end of the day. I’m still lost I’m still broken I’m still confused and don’t know what I want to be when I grow up even though I’m 31. The only thing I do know is that that drug is not going to get me there.
A warm welcome to me.
This forum and the people on here are extremely supportive!
Without abusing stuff, without active addiction in our lives we can finally start to live. Welcome here Annamarie. And congrats on 34 days of freedom, that’s huge! Being here has helped me so much (and still is), I hope and think it can help you too. So many good folks here fighting the same fight and facing the same problems. Participate, read, learn! Welcome again and success on your journey! Hugs.
welcome here! this is a very touching story. 34 days already! good for you! and good that you are here to help you support in your recovery. Can imagine you feel it to be a long road ahead but 34 is aready a lot of one days at the time!
Thank you everyone. I’m not the best with electronic devices, if you guys have any advice on navagating through this site please let me know
The number of different subjects and threads on this forum can be overwhelming, especially early on. If you’re looking for specific information you can use the magnifying glass on top and search for specific keywords. There’s one thread I use the most and that’s this one: Checking in daily to maintain focus #9 . I tagged you in it. Many of the folks on this forum post there daily about their progress and struggles. And otherwise, take your time, look around, ask, learn (again). Hope you’ll find what you need.
Hi Anna. I’m in the same boat as you. Lifetime full of addictions starting with alcohol at 17. I’m now 35 and my latest addiction was also meth. Oh meth is so powerful! Like you it took everything from me in a year. Last year I went to treatment twice. The first time my husband had filed for divorce and no contact orders on him and my son. I tried so hard to keep my normal life but I just couldn’t put the needle down. I relapsed the first time after 53 days. I was staying with my parents and they kicked me out. Was homeless for about two months before I went back to treatment again. This time I got everything back. I was so lucky to have another chance at life. I’m now with my husband and son again. But with 6 months clean I still think about using on a daily basis. I thought by now it would be so much easier. I’m still just not feeling normal without it. I go to counseling and meetings but still fighting this battle harder then ever. If you want to talk I’m here!
I can relate…I am 251 days clean and it’s a process but it keeps getting better…keep up the good work and great attitude 
Thank you very much.