Hi all, im new to the community but have really enjoyed being able to read posts from people with a similar mindset thank you!
I have been trying to recover from alcohol for many years and keep failing. I’ve tried counselling, meetings etc but can’t stick to anything or find the right path.
Its early days (again) but I’m desperate to be sober. Does anyone have any advice how to deal with the first few days/weeks/months?
Hi. Same boat here. I have been told by a good source that the guilt sting will motivate you in the short term. As things settle down it will be easy to relapse. Stay vigilant. Stick with your support programs more even though your life seems to be returning to “normal” and stay focused. You can win this fight.
Thank you 
Welcome @Naomi1 this community has been amazing for me. Checking in here regularly plus going to AA, getting a sponsor, going thru the 12 steps, creating a sober community around me has been my key to winning over the addiction so far.
Early on…the first two weeks were hard for me. You really are going thru breaking habits. Distraction is good! Identify your witching hours and planning something to do is helpful. Plenty of water, a multivitamin, and eatting well will help too.
Thank you so much. I must keep busy however futile it seems to everyone around me. I find it difficult at home when noone else understands the mentality and judges.
I have a made a to do list and next job is to find a sponsor!
Hey Naomi! Welcome 
To start with, honesty and accountability. Be brutally honest with yourself and everyone you confide in about your sober journey. Make yourself accountable every single day.
One of the things that panicked me the most was thinking about the enormity of being sober for the rest of my life. This is far too much for an addicted mind to handle in your very early sobriety. You just focus on the day that you are on, and hold yourself accountable for that one day. Say to yourself every morning - I WILL NOT DRINK TODAY. Then do exactly that. You will thank yourself so much tomorrow morning for not giving in the day before. Repeat this process every day.
We often talk about a sober toolbox here. Everyone has one, and what you put in it is unique to you. You will have different coping methods and mechanisms that work for you to help you deal with times you are struggling. This can be anything from AA meetings, Talking Sober site, to meditation or praying, walking / running / going to the gym, going to the cinema, going to see family friends… Etc. Etc. You decide what it is you’re going to do when you struggle, and ensure you execute the plan.
If you’re the kind of person that drinks at a certain time of the day, then make sure you have a new plan for that time. Otherwise, your brain will try to keep running the ‘drink’ program. You have to take yourself out of any situation that triggers you.
Start improving your health in general. Keeping fit, eating well, taking supplements if it’s needed. Thiamin (vitamin B1) is often recommended to people who have been drinking for a considerable time. I take it myself, amongst other supplements. The constant battering your body and mind takes from alcohol abuse over time kills your energy and motivation. This will help.
Be patient and kind with yourself, BUT - take no bullshit from yourself either. There will always be a ‘reason’ to drink. Oh that was such a long day, I deserve a drink after that… Oh this happened and it was so stressful… Yada yada. These aren’t reasons, they are excuses because not drinking is making you uncomfortable. Suck it up. You can’t go sober without calling yourself out on your BS. Deal with it. The reward is coming in the morning, and you’ll be so proud of yourself.
Set yourself challenges. Check in here every day, again, keeping yourself accountable.
I wish you the best of luck on your journey, we are here if you need a chat, or if you need to get things off your chest. You CAN do this 
Thank you @Binx and @Jeylexa12 !
I want to stop now because it will destroy me. I grew up in a house of alcoholism and I always said I’d never repeat the pattern yet here I am.
You’re exactly right on the accountability, i always take responsibility for my actions but then dont change my behaviour.
I have a lot of work to do but I want to do it once a d for all!
No problem at all Naomi 
Your reasons for wanting to give up have to be a lot stronger than your urge to drink. Write down this list, and whenever you have an urge to drink, read them, and read them again. Reading your early posts here is also very useful. Don’t make the mistake of thinking you’ll ever be able to moderate, because you won’t. It won’t take long to get back to drinking at the level you did before.
In case it sounds like I’m sober a lot longer than you, I’m not. I’m on day 63 after falling into the moderation trap, but I’ve learned some really tough lessons along the way.
Expect more from yourself than this vicious cycle. You got this! 
I knew for a long time the drink was getting hold of me…id wake up after a black out crying because i felt so trapped by this disease i really couldnt see a way out, i contemplated suicide many times because i thought i could never get better but here i am almost 10 months on and the happiest ive been in my adult life (im 43) i know how that despair feels but you CAN do it!!
I can only tell you what i did and hope it helps…
I took time off work with ‘depresssion’
Apart from work i was honest with every single person close to me about what was going on
For the first week my mother had my car key and my best friend controlled my money
I came on here every single day, talked and read as much as i could
After a week i had decided that was it and it was my responsibility and mine only wether i drank or not so i got back my car keys and money
I read allen cars easy way to quit drinking which changed my minset about drinking forever
With the help of people on here i made a plan to not be around any kind of drinking for at least 3 months, i didnt keep it in the house, kept away from anywhere that sold alcohol socially and even kept away from the booze aisle in the supermarket
After 3 months and even now im still only around drinking if its with close family and or supportive friends
I watched the Stutz documentary on Netflix
I study positive psychology and work on my self esteem daily
Il be on this journey for the rest of my life, ive accepted that i can never go back to being a normal drinker, if i have 1 drink it will open up the flood gates, luckily i can control not having that first one and for that i am truly grateful.
Wish you well, sending my love 
Hey Naomi, I was desperate too and it took me forever. Some of the things I did that helped you can find here…
Hope this helps a little. Focus on today, right now, be sober now. Stay in the present and go to bed early if you can. Each day, focus on that day only. You just have to stay sober right now. Today. 