I’ve been hospitalized twice, nearly lost my marriage and kids, destroyed some very important relationships, my mind is full of regrets. Started drinking in 2017, was out of control within a few months, decided yesterday (after another regrettable decision that I will remember forever) that I want to be done with this. Drinking is ruined. I’ve been living a double life. Hiding it from most everyone. Today, I won. Tomorrow is another day.
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Welcome! I’m glad you’ve made the right choice with sobriety 
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Make tomorrow as you did today: one day at a time, and saying no to that first drink.
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Keep up the good work and you will know when enough is enough! Stay in that mindset and you should be fine stay strong 
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Welcome. I am sorry you are going through so much right at the beginning of your journey. I can relate on how much harder it is. I can also tell you how gratifying it is when you make it through the day. I am almost 89 days sober from alcohol and let me tell you, it’s been rough and still is. I made the choice to go to a few different types of meetings at the suggestion of a friend. One who’s story I know all too well because I was a part of it. And all he said to me was to keep coming, even if I drank. And I did. I also decided not to go to a meeting while drinking so I didnt drink. I started reaching out to people but very few. After I had processed that every time I said something it became lighter for me. So I began to do it more often. Then I found this! And between meetings, here, alys in recovery and a will to be better today then i was yesterday i will be 89 days at midnight. If your up for it maybe read the story i just posted. Tonight was motivational for me and i think may help you see a positive effect in sobriety. I am glad your here and hope to hear from you soon.
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Welcome to our community.
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Some of us have to see hell before we decide enough is enough… Learn from the wreckage your drinking has caused and even if you have a craving pull on those memories to remind yourself why you want recovery.
I wish you luck and success, one addict to another you got this and I’m rooting for you.
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Welcome and well done on taking the first step and admitting you have an addiction to alcohol. What I did in the early days was write a letter to myself. It was brutally honest and totally how I felt at that moment in the beginning. I detailed how much I was drinking and how much I was hiding it from everyone. I put down how awful I felt. The depression the anxiety the suicidal thoughts…everything! I’m now at nearly 470 days and I have only had to read it once (so far) and it stopped the craving dead! The addict brain is a sneaky bastard and will try to convince you that you didn’t have a problem when you are feeling better. ONCE A CUCUMBER BECOMES A PICKLE IT CAN NEVER GO BACK TO BEING A CUCUMBER.- I heard that on here early on and it resonated with my intense addiction to alcohol. I wish you all the very best and I’m so glad you found this place. Use it! Read, vent or just have a bit of a natter. You are surrounded on here with people that have been where you are my friend. Come on in…we’ve got ya 
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How bad does it have to get?
I think the biggest problem we have is we see it from our point of view, I didn’t see a problem with my drinking or behavior until I viewed them from space, metaphorically speaking,
When your in the trenches you dont see or hear the noise around you, but when your watching from the snipers nest you see everything
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Welcome! Keep being sober, life is better
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Each day sober is a victory. I found that every time I thought I had hit rock bottom there was further to slide, until I had lost my house, my marriage, all my possessions and money, my self respect and I was sleeping on a bench outside a post office in wet clothes at night in poor health. However, have faith and take one day at a time. You have made a life-changing decision to get sober and it only gets better from here, 
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Congratulations buddy. Keep doing exactly that. One day at a time.
You ask “how bad does it have to get?”
As bad as we let it get.
Maybe it’s got as bad as it’s going to get for you.
Only you can know this.
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Can ask the guys in the graveyard that ,thats how bad , wish you well
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