How do you deal with nasty people that you can't walk away from

Any advice is gladly accepted.

If I come into work early, which I like to do, there is a group of women who come in early and spend the first hour loudly bitching about people who are not there.

It is not in my nature to interject, plus I would be constantly interjecting and I know what these people are like (i.e. there is no point and they will just be encouraged to turn on me)

The bitching really affects me, even for days after. Even if it’s about people I don’t particularly see eye to eye with myself.

Any suggestions of how to deal with this.


Use this time to have earpods in, even if you don’t listen to anything it creates a barrier between you. This is my number one tip for any one who doesn’t want to engage or talk to people. It clearly says NO.

Also, it’s not your responsibility to get involved or tittle tattle on them or protect their victims… Just look at these sad miserable and cruel and pathetic ADULTS and feel sorry for their miserly nature. Bloody Nora, as if there aren’t real things going on in the world.

Take the high road pal; water off a ducks back.


Earbuds are absolutely my go to, as well. And I appreciated your message, as I can be affected by those kinds of experiences also that I have little control over outwardly and have to focus inwardly. It can be so damn hard sometimes! But:

Hell yes to this.

@Badger the only other thing I would suggest is that if you do see it actually having a negative effect out side of them bitching as a group, say, bullying or mistreating the people they are bitching about (which can happen when a group emboldens themselves through gossipy talk) then it would definitely be worth reporting to a supervisor/HR.


Thank you so much for the sound advice, I really appreciate it. Xx


Echo Rosa on responsibility towards reporting any untoward real issues. However, just be aware that if it is a truly toxic and dangerous unstable situation sometimes it’s not ok for you to ‘Whistleblow’ and if you feel you fall in those category it’s ok to keep yourself out of it. But I would get another job… As that’s not ok on the whole and chips away at you inside until you can’t take it. You deserve better.


Brilliant suggestion! Ignorance really is bliss sometimes! :blush:


That’s a really good point.

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I use headphones or go to my car for breaks. I cant stand the toxicity and there is tons of it at my workplace, thats part of the reason for my alcoholism, but thats going to change!


Absolutely well said! I needed to hear that this morning!:+1:

My take on it is
If you have no legitimate history of talking with them outside of work context

Then let them be
You don’t need them to make you a point of their personal disgust of themselves