I had no idea I was an alcoholic until I enrolled in a outpatient program May 5th of 2020. The news blew my mind. But looking back on all the things, all the years… it added up… and I have been one since I was 16 I am now 44. I lived life hard and fast all through my 20’s then slowed down some due to many time of drug overdoses got things together in my life. Things were going well. So I thought then my father passed in 2015 and I haven’t been the same since… a lot of trauma has happened between then and almost 2 years ago… and I am having a hard time dealing with that as well… I forgot to mention I had a lot of trauma growing up and things happened in my 20’s as well. I choose not to discuss them openly here…at this moment. But maybe someday…
That’s big that you can come here and say that. I hope you can find peace and healing. You got this!
Yes I have come so far. But a long ways to go… right now I don’t feel like I am winning at all…
Just one step at a time. One right thing at a time. I started reading Quit Like a Woman and it’s changing a lot of my perspective. I’d recommend it if you haven’t read it.
I will thanks… I am always looking for self help books. I just found a sponsor which mean a lot to me. And finally found a on line A A meeting that is going 24/7
Holly Whitaker wrote that book?
I’m learning a lot of us have had crazy trauma. Don’t know if it led to the abusing substances issues, or just a common theme in trying to deal with messed up situations… Real life can be hard. Just trying to face it. It’s actually getting easier, I’m feeling less triggers, less anxiety and over all better mood the longer i haven’t drank. But i know I’m not in the clear. I am doing counseling again, hopefully it will help with those sub issues… 
Just know it will get better,I have a cocaine problem and I have a serious heart condition. Having a heart attack last month opened my eyes,my life is more precious than doing drugs and unfortunately it took me almost dying to realize that.i had to put my faith back in GOD and and pray everyday,change my environment.but rest assured it will get better,I’m pulling for you💯
Thanks. I too have a heart condition. Good luck to you as well.
As for me I had trauma first… and the alcohol main the pain go away. But then more trauma piled on so I drank more and more and buil a tolerance is what I have been told
Thank you!!