She’s got a gambling and alcohol addiction that’s out of control and not normal it’s causing issues for people around her, it must be mental health she needs help with… how do I go about getting her sectioned? Thanks
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When a person has addiction / mental health problems, it is extremely worrying for the loved ones. I understand the want to just “fix” it as quickly and entirely as possible. Addiction and mental health are not like that. It takes a long time, and it takes the addicted person themselves to do it. What have you tried with them so far? Have you tried introducing programs such as AA / SMART / Recovery Dharma, intensive outpatient programs, mental health services, etc?
Al-Anon is a program just for loved ones with addiction. I suggest you research groups on your area. There will be lots of people who can give advice and support about how to talk to and deal with an addicted person.
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I read a few of your previous posts and see you have been talking to a group, and some of the things your mum has been doing.
Another thing is to set boundaries for yourself. She is your mum, and when she is sober, give her your time and love and try to reason with her. But tell her, (when she is sober) that you will no longer have anything to do with her when she is drunk. Don’t give her money, don’t answer the phone, don’t go to her house. etc. I’m sure I can’t understand the worry and frustration (because I was the one causing the worry and frustration) but your mum is an adult and she cannot be controlled.
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I’m just worried that my mum is gonna die and I’m struggling to sleep at night when I know my mum is drinking dangerously (litre bottle of vodkas each day) hence posting at 4am.. I’d feel much better and be able to sleep at night if I know she was getting better in a patients sectioned mental health place or even prison.. I’d rather her in prison than dying because atleast she has a chance to get better and recover 
how do people here deal with the worry and stress of losing a family member dying to alcohol? Because the worry, stress and anxiety means I’m struggling to sleep because I’m worried I’ll lose my only parent and one of my only remaining family members
Thanks again
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You have to focus and work on yourself. As previously said the addiction of your mother is not your business nor can you do anything about it, let alone control it or force her to act in a certain way, decide something on her behalf or help her.
What you are sharing about yourself reminds me partly of myself. Wanting the sober version of a loved one, worrying about the fuckup the person causes when drinking.
Fact is, detachment, hard boundaries and distancing from the drunken drama AND your own worries is necessary. You need help, to me it sounds you are knee-deep stuck in codependency. Go to therapy, join an al-anon meeting daily, block your mother and her friends to keep away from you what is not ment for you. It’s not your responsibility, it’s not up to you to fix anything, it’s HER problem. You are effected because you love and care. That’s the horrible collateral damage addictions cause.
One thing I want to make clear: You don’t stop loving your mum when you withdraw from the situation and stop to enable, engage, call, visit, listen & answer her friends.
When you stop acting on her behaviour and your own emotions, you learn to sit with it.
When you learn to sit with it, you create space where new things can happen.
Sending calming vibes, focus on yourself and let go the things you can’t control 
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Here in Scotland there are mental health teams that you can contact i did this for my cousin she had Schizophrenia in your case maybe meetings might help wish you well
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It is hard indeed worrying about a family member who is stuck in addiction, sadly, way too many people in the world do it every day. A couple of things I have found most helpful is focusing on my own mental health. Finding a therapist for myself, so I can talk thru my feelings and find coping mechanisms so I am not up all night worrying about something out of my control (which, as we know is hard to do). Focusing on helping yourself to learn to cope better will help you be a loving support to your Mom. It also sounds like you have a lot of your own personal issues a mental health professional could help with. Sometimes we overly focus on another to avoid our own issues, believe me, I have done this.
My suggestion is to reach out to a mental health professional to discuss your worries and your life, see where that leads.
Wishing you the best.
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She’s drunk and keeps saying stuff like she will take all her tablets medication (she’s on a lot of medication) and she doesn’t want to be here anymore etc.. most of the time it’s drunk talk because she likes the attention but then I’m up all night worrying… it seems selfish 
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Why you listen? You already got advice: let it be and focus on yourself. her drinking is nothing you can do about.
you don’t want to change, you want to stay where you are and rant about it.
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Ive been thinking about you Majek ive been in a very similar position when it was my ex partner and it is really hard to cope with, how are you doing today? Sending love and hugs xx
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I’m at my mums house now… she’s gambling, losing then drinking everyday and it’s making her grab knives and be suicidal saying I’ll stab myself and take all my tablets (she’s on anti-depressants etc) in one go … is there anything I can do as her child and next of Kin to get her sectioned and go away in a Mental Health Unit for a few months to get a break from this daily grind of worrying constantly to get her better mentally? Because clearly this is not normal her bedroom is like a pig-sty, she doesn’t wash herself, can’t manage her finances (gambling all her rent money etc which then makes her sad so she drinks which makes her more low and emotional then talking about stabbing herself and taking all her medication in one go)
I know people say Tough Love is the only way and I can’t keep giving her money etc I need to block her out my life.. but what if she ends up dead after I block her out my life thinking I’m helping her with tough love and it doesn’t work?
i know I need to get a new Sim Card for my phone to get a break for a few months to focus on myself (after 15 years of my mum drinking and causing me daily stress and worry)
I don’t know what to do?! please help I beg you…
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It’s not as easy as you think I’ve had this daily worry and stress for 15 years of my mum drinking it’s destroyed my relationships, made me comfort eat and get fat etc.. my mum is my only parent and I don’t want to lose her.. I know people are giving me advice but I’m scared if I do the tough love approach she will have nobody then end up dead?
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Could you call the police maybe and see if they can help? Are you UK based? I know when I got really drunk one night and couldn’t look after myself when I was still in active addiction the police came out… I was classed as a “vulnerable adult” and was taken to hospital where they got a mental health crisis team out…
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you repeat the pattern, you asked for before. so given advice is the same. stop enabling, get your focus on yourself, call ambulance/police and stop interacting. you don’t want to do that. that’s your choice. no, you won’t hear anything else to support your own codependent party you refuse to step out. get help for yourself and control your own life. yes it hurts and worries. nothing you can do about it.
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I do not live in your country and I know that it’s different in different countries.
She is clearly a threat to herself and to others. In my country you would
( should) be able to call emergency services and get her help.
Like what @Starlight14 is saying. She needs help.
Over here in my country, these are the ‘red flag’ people who don’t get the help they need, and then go out and kill a bunch of people.
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If you are in the UK I think it will be very hard to get someone sectioned if an alcoholic, as there is no easy way to make an assessment if the person is under the influence, and sectioning someone is not to be taken lightly as it is a shady area in terms of human rights and freedom.
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I used to work in forensic mental health btw.
If she has an episode where she’s a danger then during that episode call the police. Maybe this can help. But she could just end up with a drunk and disorderly charge
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