Thank you. I ended up having the same ole terrifying “close to using” dreams I have so often. But today, I felt A LOT better than I did last night. It is just another example of how THESE FEELINGS WILL PASS. But man, when I am feeling them it feels like they never will. I have meeting tonight I plan on sharing at, hopefully I don’t allow my anxiety to hold me back. I always feel better after I share, I just need to get it out and keep letting people know what I’m going through.
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I hate hate hate hate drugs. I really want to get through this so I never hurt my child the way I have in the past. Today I have a choice over my actions and behaviors. Thank you for your support!
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Congratulations! I hope you feel much stronger now and that you know even if these feelings come back, you will make it without using. Keep up the fight!
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So proud of you for getting through those rough feelings 
I had to make a plan for myself, when I get like that. So I know what to do next time it hits.
Your not alone, although it can feel like that sometimes. We are all here.
I use to use and drink late at night from 10pm and be up all night.
Nowadays, especially recently I have had bad feelings to use and drink. I have had to lay in bed looking at the wall and remind myself that when I was high and drinking I use to look at that same wall crying feeling worse and praying to be sober.
I’m so glad you reached out here.
Big
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Your strength and determination was truly inspiring. I read the entire thread just now and was moved on how you shared your struggle and overcame for you and your child.
What an incredible mother you are. 
I am glad you were here to find help and push those demons aside in your mind.
ODAAT
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