I am so fat

Emotional Support
30

Hey, I am sorry you’re feeling this way. When I first went into recovery from bulimia, the self-hate was high. My changing body was scary. I felt like an alien in my own skin.

I think unless you’ve had an eating disorder, it’s difficult to understand. It’s a bit different to alcoholism in the sense you have to eat, you have to face your fear every day, or you die.

You can’t feel fat. This is important. You can feel angry, sad, nervous, scared, but not fat. Fat is just a thing we all have, and fat doesn’t equal bad person.

You need to work on your brain. It’s lying to you, it’s starved, it’s panicked. I really REALLY REALLY reccomend speaking to your doctor and looking for CBT. We can all say kind words, but you must wanna help yourself. I know this sounds hard, but it’s tough love. I only got help when I was on death’s door - I couldn’t have got help sooner because I didn’t want to.

Also, read. I devoured books on body politics, anti diets, feminism, all that stuff. Books that spoke how our bodies are war zones, how our bodies are often weaponised, and they spoke about ways to counteract these negative brain patterns.

Make sure you’re eating and sleeping. Again, I’ve said this before, you cannot no matter what diet. Ever. Again. Three meals a day, doctors, sleep, some movement, books. And a load of effort xxxx

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31

People with eating disorders should never EVER eliminate foods from there diets ever. At least not for the first few years, until they’re recovered totally. The behaviours around food are more important than what goes in their body. If they eat cake three times a day, without shame, guilt or fear, that’s better than dieting and being frightened about food that might “effect their chemistry”.

Please don’t talk about types of food people should or shouldn’t eat. It’s basically similar to telling alcoholics what beer they should and shouldn’t drink. It’s besides the point, at the moment.

I’ve recovered from bulimia and you cannot mess about with your diet whilst recovering or do anything that still labels food “good” and “bad”. You just eat what you want, and try and work on feelings surrounding that. This isn’t a “what diet is best” thread - this is a “I can’t face any food how can I cope and live with this” thread.

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32

Thanks for adding your voice @Ashleigh. I think you hit the nail on the head.

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33

No problem. It’s a bit worrying. Talking about diets in a thread like this is the equivalent of posting a photo of booze in a thread that says “I’m about to relapse and drink please help me”.

I think there needs to be a bit more moderation on threads like this. It’s actually very triggering for someone with an eating disorder to read about diets, especially in a thread that’s supposed to be a safe place.

It actually makes me really mad because diet talk is everywhere and THE ONE PLACE it shouldn’t be is here, on this post.

And I say diet because any food restriction/advice/plan counts in my mind.

X

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34

It’s too bad more people don’t realize the trigger factor. Even having had ED struggles, I have a really reduced trigger response to diet/food topics (and hence a lack of full awareness), mainly because I got help so early and was fortunate not to get too sucked into my ED. Many are not so lucky.

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