I’ve tried to atop and stop but I just can’t I’m feeling extremely disheartened and depressed what should I do? Just give up? Just throw all my work out the window because I failed again? I’m in trying to have my belief if God and have my relationship with him but I don’t know why I can’t stop its taking over and in scared.
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In order for me to get sober and stay sober I had to have a plan. My plan was AA. I went to 90 meetings in 90 days. Got a big book and a 12 and 12. Got a sponsor. I pray and meditate (I’m pretty crappy at meditation 
) and use this app daily. So far I have stayed sober and my quality of life has drastically improved.
I know if I don’t drink and regularly go to meetings along with maintaining a fit spiritual condition, I will have a much better chance of staying sober. 
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Maybe look out a SA meeting im sure if you google your find a meeting and help wish you well
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I second the SA meeting
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An SA meeting might be helpful for you, in person or online.
Are you familiar with Victory Shield app? It might be quite helpful for you. It’s based on Christian values, and there’s a fair amount of content specific to Christian females who struggle with porn or other sexual acting out…
I have downloaded the app myself. And, while I can’t relate to everything there, I have found some of the daily content to be quite helpful.
Please check in with this community often; daily if you can. As you read around all the threads, you will find lots of insights and support…
And, as a Christian, be confident that Jesus will help you to eventually overcome this.
We’re here for you; you got this! 