Thank you all for your kind words. I have to admit, I didn’t handle it very well and went on a bender for two days or so. But, I would come and read the posts here each day, and see how everyone else was coping and it was truly helpful. Normally a bender like that would last much longer. I already feel much better. So it does work to reach out.
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I can relate. I did this too. My lesson was sobriety is a journey not a destination.
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How do people deal with the depression, once stopping. 12 steps 'take time. What d o other people do in the meantime?
I found that Journaling my feelings and events has helped. It gave me a chance to get my emotions out and then I can read it and see how I can work on my thoughts. I have also found that trying to redecorating my environment has helped a lot. I didn’t have to but new things, just rearrange them, create a new flow. I started to like the flow and it helped me keep my head up! I know each person does it differently but those little things helped me mentally.
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You will sometimes relapse, but I’ve recently been to a detox program myself and have only been sober again for a week after 7 months of drinking. Before the 7 month relapse or binge I was sober for 2 years. But what I was reading in a book you can get in AA or online is called Living Sober. The words stated this “don’t call it falling off the wagon because you are focusing on your failures and not your time you’ve put into being and staying sober!” So do NOT focus on the fact you had a relapse, unfortunately this is a part of our disease. We all have relapses! Focus instead on the times you’ve been sober and the effort you put into that time in order to stay that way. 
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My sponsor tells me the only step that you have to get right everyday is step 1 admit that you are powerless to drugs and or alcohol and just don’t use today if you have to tell yourself that you can use tomorrow and then do the same thing the next morning admit you are powerless and that you just can’t use today and so on and so on also another thing is playing the tape all the way through think about how your whole day or night would turn out when you did use I know when I used I spent money I couldn’t afford would cause issues with my girlfriend or family would feel like shit the next morning and I realized that’s it’s not worth it
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yeah, apparently I bought a new computer. So that was a nice expensive I didn’t plan for.
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Thank you. Going from addiction to addiction is my problem. I now have to stop Fluoxetine, because a read an article saying that it causes eye problems.
I seems that as your sponsor says, do Step 1 every day, no matter what addiction you have to stop,
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Just know that your not alone. Your not the only one going through this. I’m right there with you!!. We got this.
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Well said, my problem thinking is feeling deprived but love this thinking, im going to incorporate it into my daily
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Hi all. I just wanted to give an update. Two days after I posted this I sobered up and have not had a drink since. I get a few urges sometimes but have been able to overcome them. And much of that has to do with this site. I come on here to read the successes (and struggles) of others dealing with the same issue and it has helped me tremendously to put my urges to drink in perspective and to remember the cost isn’t worth it. I would like to thank you all so, so much. Your comments and support have meant more than you will ever know. Thank you.
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Sometimes we fail, its up to us to try again.
The most important thing is that you continue to try and not give up.
Giving up is the worst thing you can do.
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That’s great news! Congratulations! Keep checking in with us! 
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Fantastic! Are you working any sort of recovery program? AA has completely changed the way I live and view everything. The program, and my HP, saved my life. I’m so glad you’re doing well!
At least that’s a useful purchase… I once bought a quite expensive foot-tall statue of Yoda lol. All he does is sit on a bookshelf.
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I’m not in a program yet. That is the next step.
Podcasts that help you stay sober? Recommendations?
I can’t emphasize enough how important that is. For me, the step work set me free. There were so many resentments and hurts I had caused that kept me from being the best version of myself. I can’t be that when I’m drinking. AA is the way I live my life today. I’m not sure I’d be here if it weren’t for the program.
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After relapse number 20+ I was so confused why I kept drinking even though I didn’t want to but also really wanted to! Like WTF. I felt physically and mentally awful, I was so confused how I knew I didn’t want that yet I still did it. It’s emotional and it’s heartbreaking. What got me sober was help! I obviously couldn’t do it on my own so I found help. I’m so grateful and just love life right now. You deserve to feel great too
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