I quit drinking almost a week ago because I am starting DBT therapy to treat my BPD.
My boyfriend broke up with me yesterday and I am devastated. Said with tears in his eyes…. He is very much in love with me but cannot be here while I go through this because the damage has been done.
I feel awful. I feel like relapsing. I feel like i’m an awful person. I hate my bpd. I hate alcohol. I hate myself.
I am so sorry that happened to you just now when you really don’t need it.
Focus on yourself right now. Do the right thing by you and be kind to yourself. Get the help you need.
Remember: alcohol can’t make any situation better, but it can make every situation worse.
TBH I don’t even understand what he’s saying. It doesn’t matter (to me) either. Please be absolutely sure you’re doing the right thing with choosing sobriety and therapy over drugging and boozing. You do this out love for yourself. This is coming from someone with BPD (and Avoidant) traits himself, who is still so happy he quit using substances himself and went into therapy sober. It works! One day at a time. Keeep going friend. Sorry for your BF leaving. Only thng you can do is to keep working on yourself, to grow, to learn. You’re not alone. Using never helped anybody. Big big hugs
I crashed out on him several times. He thinks the damage is done and can’t move past it. I am in a lot of pain. I hate my life a lot. Ill keep doing dbt and not drink but it feels like theres no point
I am so sorry. It never feels good to break up and there are so many emotions we need to feel and release. 
I know when I was working to get sober, it took all my energy, emotion and time and it was the best thing I have ever done for myself, keep moving forward with your plan for healing. 
You are worthy of love and happiness and a healthy healing life. 
That is just a feeling and it will pass
once you get through this you’ll realize how strong you are and you’ll be able to make it through anything clean/sober
You got this, and we’re with you.
Amazing that you are sober 
, sorry to hear the hurt you’re feeling. Life gives us situations that make us feel emotions much stronger then when we were intoxicated and numb. It will pass,One day at a time. 
well done for starting therapy. One step at a time, one breath at a time