The thing is , I always think I have control , this is the problem , I’ll go a few days and then think only one , which may end up being just that maybe two or three, then the second day it’s more and the third it’s more and then the 4 th I drink till I pass out or piss myself and then o wake up and carry on … it’s a sliplery slope that I have no control on … sick to death of being sick to death x day 1
It’s just a cycle that needs to be broken, I have the same issue thinking I can control it and that I can have just one to be social but alcohol is addiction and it’s best not to feed the addiction at all. So maybe accept that we can’t be like others who can have one small glass. It has to be a complete change in perspective and lifestyle. Stay strong and keep trying
I’m taking control. I’m learning how to do it, and it’s not easy but I want to be in control. I desperately want to be able to control how much or how often I drink, but I now know I can’t. I constantly feel like the alcohol controls me and I hate that feeling more than I like alcohol.
The first one…it’s always the first one. It inhibits us. It burys the pain. It dulls us. Our brains want more then. Why wouldn’t we? We’re only human after all. Try to keep yourself out of the way of that.
People will disappoint you. Life will go on either way. What you consciously choose to help or hinder your situation is your call.
I drank and used drugs for 2 years. The past year was heavy. I black out. I blame anything but the substances who’ve comforted me. No more.
You have to want this so bad that you can taste it over the shit you’ve been doing.
I understand all too well what you’re saying. Know you are not alone.