I’m falling at not relapsing. Help me please.
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Im sorry to hear ur struggling 
I was a chronic relpaser myself for quite some time. Usually every 3 days id fall. Like many others on here, I had to make some serious changes to get clean.
1st thing i had to do was to make it extremely difficult for me to use/drink. So if that menas having someone else hold ur $$ temporarily, deleting and blocking dealers numbers, removing any substances out of the home, etc that is what i had to do first.
2nd thing was to write down my reasons for quitting. I held onto this paper everywhere i went. Any time i had the urge to use or drink id read it over and remember how bad things got. It was important for me to do this as my mind would often lie to me and make me forget how bad things get when i use or drink.
3rd thing was 12 step meetings. They helped tremendously!!! They were a safe zone for me for a long time. If u cant get to in person mtgs, there are some online thru the Intherooms app.
What sorts of things have u tried to be free of ur addiction? Every relapse is a learning tool. It can show u where u need to make changes so that it doesnt happen again.
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Thank you. I relapse every 3 days to a week at this moment.
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Our addict minds will lie to us constantly. It will make excuses for why we should use, or try to justify it, or make us forget how bad it was. Drugs and alcohol serve no good purpose. They truly dont benefit us in any way. The idea that they “help” with stress or trauma or intense emotion etc is a lie. If u can begin to determine when that addict part of u is showing itself, u can challenge that thought 
hit up a meeting, come on here (like u have been doing - which i think is great!!!), use distraction like exercise or cleaning or go for a walk or have a nice shower, take it min by min if u have to. Just dont pick up. Overtime, the urges do die down and the strength of those urges lessen. Its just getting over that 3 day - 1 week hurdle thats holding u up.
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I highly agree with what Dana said. Go to AA, NA, CA whatever type of meeting you feel fits your addiction and get a sponsor if you can. Personally, AA has been a life saver for me and has truly changed my relationship with myself and understanding the addict brain. The addict mind is a disease, it’s an illness. Like @Butterflymoonwoman said it lies. It’s cunning, baffling and powerful. If you struggle with the God part of it, so did I and so do many but if you can put your ego aside and ignore that part for the time being and keep showing up, going to meetings and doing the work, you will be astounded by the power of the program. Its uncomfy at first but thays where the growth happens. There are no benefits to drugs and alcohol. Just a viscious cycle of sorrow, despair and hopelessness. Whatever “high” you get is not worth the lows and I think you see this otherwise you wouldn’t be here. AA has helped deepen this understanding for me and made me realize we are not alone in this struggle and recovery IS possible. It’s not easy. But it is possible. The alternative is just not worth it! Addiction can feel isolating and shameful which feeds the addiction more. Going to meetings, admitting you’re powerless can be scary but it can also be sooo freeing. There’s an app called Meeting Guide that I use to find meetings in my area. I have a Homegroup and try to go to meetings at least 4 days a week but there are so many online meetings too. I am relatively new in my sobriety journey and like you relapsed many times but I can honestly say this is the strongest I’ve felt in my sobriety. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Are you ready to make the change? Sobriety offers a quality of life I didn’t think was possible but here I am 40 days and hoping to turn those days into years just one day at a time. Reach out instead of using. Trust me you wont regret it.
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It sounds like a routine pattern of using rather than relapsing.
My main source of escaping the grindstone was educating myself with the understanding of what was happening during this cycle and what’s happening with addiction generally.
I highly recommend getting and reading a book about addiction involving your drug of choice, also secondly watch pod casts and videos, especially TED talks if you find some on YouTube about the subject.
Stay active on here, every day come to this forum and read the posts, keep active.
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