Hi All
My name is Bob from Northern Ireland. I visited my GP last week after never being to a Dr in over 4 years, I had suffered depression from my late 30’s from business stress but never used alcohol to mask it . I was on all types of antidepressants that never worked till I realised I suffered SAD seasonal effective disorder so moved to Spain which cured my depression. The big problem was my mother fell ill and I returned once the winter hi here in Ireland my mood plummeted. I was then having to live in a house 60 miles away due to having my dog . It all started when I was in isolation had been financially scammed out of my life savings and turned to suicide thoughts and used alcohol as my crutch back in November last year and it didn’t stop to point I was drinking a bottle of whisky a day to keep the demons out off my head. I wasn’t showering looking after myself apart from going to the shop to get a microwave dinner and food for my beloved Labrador. I eventually opened up to my sister that lives in England who made me register with a GP here in Northern Ireland. At this stage I was getting the shakes if I was not drinking. I took the plunge and said enough is enough and went to the Dr. I was px Librium bit b and Thaiane. I am now on day 4 of the detox and the last three days have been hell but at least I am sleep 9 hours and no alcohol cravings. I just do not what will happen after I come off the course as I have been doing this on my own. I got my bloods done today and very worried what they will reveal with the abuse I have put myself through. I was fit and going to the gym but the past four months just been lying on a sofa doing nothing. I am interested to hear what to expect after the detox course because it is frightening me a little bit. Thanks for reading my story 
Hi Dazzler
Welcome & congrats on starting your sober journey. I also live in NI, I’m 4 months sober after 13 years of being an alcoholic and 4 serious attempts at getting sober, 4 attempts that failed. I really want this one to be my last attempt.
Best things about being sober: good quality sleep, there’s nothing like it. My mind is a lot clearer, I’m getting stuff done, I thought I was an introvert but I’m actually craving company. I work in a fast food restaurant so there’s always people around but when I’m not working I want to do things, go out, be with people. I am getting more exercise as is my dog. I’m finishing tasks & projects quicker. I’m a procrastinater by nature. No more night sweats (thought that was due to menopause - I’m 47, they stopped immediately after I quit drinking) I remember what I have actually done, I don’t smell of booze, I’m keeping promises, I’m laughing so much more than I ever did.
Things I don’t like about sobriety: so many emotions (the first 2 months was crazy with emotions) I felt physically & emotionally exhausted, I had a mild headache for about 3 weeks. I remember telling my sister several times that I was in pain but now that I think about it I don’t remember clearly if I meant physical, emotional or if I was just hurting from missing my wine. It was tough to get through but I’m here now & my life is a hell of a lot better than it used to be, even after only 4 months.
I’m still a little raw & unsure of myself. I’m getting a bit a acne which is weird at my age. I now have a chocolate addiction. Sobriety is making me self reflect & that’s work lol (do I put that in the good or bad list 
)
I didn’t go to see my doctor or take time off work, if I could go back in time, just 4½ months I would convince myself to take at least 2 weeks off work. I basically slept all of January.
I’m so happy you’re here, it’s a good community, very supportive. Keep checking in, chatting to people, there’s a lot going on. All the best 
Thanks for sharing your story Bob. You’ve been through a lot! Congrats on choosing sobriety. I think the biggest step you made by coming here, by not going it alone anymore. We need each other in life and especially in sobriety. Can’t do it alone friend. Meetings might help. This place has helped me tremendously over the last years.
We also all need a plan to make sobriety work. We need to create ourselves a life that we don’t feel the urge to escape from by drinking. How exactly you should do that you have to find out yourself. Some good ideas can be found here:
Hang around here, read, post, learn! Glad you’re here Bob. We’re in this together. All strength and success to you!
Thank you Lisa for your kind words. I am obviously worried what the bloods are going to reveal and how I am going to feel when the Chlordiazepoxide tablets wear off but I am definitely glad to join the group and nice to speak to a northern Irish lady
My alcohol is just down to being in a shit place head wise and financial always been a strong person when it comes to will power is the reason I said enough is enough. I know it will be a rocky road ahead but after doing this detox I definitely need do not want to go through this again folks for sure.
I believe you. I just want to say willpower alone may be enough to stay sober but for a good life and real Recovery it is not enough. Two phrases I learned in Recovery: We need to build ourselves a life we don’t want to run from, and the opposite of addiction is connection. Certainly goes for me, and for everybody I met here.
I was and am a very sociable person but because I have locked myself not trained my self confidence is on the ground because I put on weight and just feel embarrassed MNo. I am taking baby steps but these tablets have just made me so sleepy and sedated it’s hard to get moving at this moment in time but I do realise if i wasn’t on them this week going cold turkey god knows what state I would be in tbh
You’re doing the right thing and I commend you for that. I’m talking about the long(er) term. For now follow the prescription and take good care of yourself. As I’m sure you are. I work in a detox facility as a mental health nurse and I see people make amazing physical improvements in a week’s (or two) time. Too fast for their own good often as people tend to forget how bad they were.
That’s great advise. When I was in getting my bloods I booked an appointment in the Dr Surgery with the mental health councillor to just get an assessment after the meds and where my head is at which I felt I needed to do.
I am doing that. Week after the med course
I will check in with you all starting to feel a bit sleepy but thank you all for your kind welcome- Bob
Welcome to TS and your new way of life. Wishing you the best with it. I’m glad you’re here.
Tomorrow is my 8th and last day on the withdrawal meds actually had the motivation to get out for a good walk and starting to eat clean again and not the one microwave dinner a day. Tomorrow will be my 9th day of no alcohol or cravings I pray it lasts also had another 10 hours sound sleep. I know baby steps but just handling it day by day. My lovely dog Rusty has been my rock as been doing this on my own.
Doing amazing Bob. It gets lots better, just keep your focus and working on you. That’s the only thing you need to make sure of… well and taking care of yer best Lab bud, he/she will need you around to help them also.
Best wishes man!!