So I got sober from alcohol from July 1st 2021 to New Year’s Eve 2022. So around a year and a half. I wasn’t mad about my decision to drink again but over this year I have slowly slipped back into the same habits I used to have. I have no off button. I black out all the time. I drove drunk last night. My sister and brother in law are so mad at me (understandably). I’m getting ready to graduate college tomorrow and I feel like I don’t even deserve to be celebrated. I have an amazing boyfriend who is the absolute love of my life. He deserves to be with someone who he doesn’t have to deal with this. I grew up with an alcoholic mother and it was so unfair to all of us and now I feel like I’m turning into her. The reality is I know that I am probably incapable of having a healthy relationship with alcohol in my lifetime. I don’t want to fuck my life up like my mom. Getting sober the first time was so isolating though and drinking is such a huge and common activity that I feel like I can’t escape it no matter what. I’m just lost and pulled and I know what I have to do I just am scared to do it. 
please don’t judge me. I have no outlet or people in my life who understand.
Welcome back! Sounds to me like you know what to do. You stayed sober a year and a half which is a huge accomplishment! You can take control of your life again. We’re rooting for you! One day at a time.
Hi! We all understand and you will not be judged. I know the feeling of trying to get sober at a young age. I entered a 28 day rehab at age 21. Thought it was a fluke but inevitably ended up in 4 more detoxes, another long stint in a rehab and 2 outpatient rehabs. All by age 25.
I also grew up with an alcoholic mother. I was able to sneak alcohol at a young age because she would pass out with wine and liqour out in the open and i would just say she drank it all when she asked about it the next day.
You will have a support system here if you just keep comming back and checking in.
Welcome
Hi Mel,
It’s good to see you. Absolutely no judgement here. You’re amongst your peers. I know, we know, it feels like a lot to give up. Which is scary. I promise you when you come out on the other side live will be better. Not easier but better. On the other side we work our Recoveries and our lives. Work which makes life worth while. Work which makes it possible to enjoy life for real, not by some chemically induced effect on your brain.
So congrats on graduating and welcome to your sober life! One day at a time as it is for all of us. Glad you’re back Mel. Let’s do this. Together. 
No judgment here. If anything, total respect for noticing the problems so young! I kept blacking out and effing stuff up for a couple more decades. 
You can have a healthy relationship with alcohol by having no relationship at all. Saying no to the first drink is the most important thing. When young and socialising it may be difficult to go against the norm. There are plenty of young people who are choosing to be sober and talking about it, Tom Holland recently talked about his experience, and others too. https://youtu.be/IReR8xXnAko?si=TTgQxC2FWK2MR_UU
Search on YouTube for others or there is a thread on here.
Drew Barrymore - stars in recovery
Who are your favorite sober celebs?
I read your post through the eye of my own child.
Although he doesn’t drink and never has so far, likely because of me. He is 21.
The first thing I thought is if you were my child I’d be so proud that you have recognised this so early, and are being active to get/stay sober.
This is a huge part of recovery that is amazing that you are willing to accept your relationship with alcohol is not a good one and that you are taking the steps to help yourself.
This community is brilliant and so supportive, keep reading and posting.
Right now is great place to start, everyday is a fresh new day, use this to live the life you deserve.
Welcome back 
Thank you so much for the support❤️
Welcome back Mel and congratulations on your graduation! That’s great and you can be proud of yourself. Here comes your cake, milk(or whatever you prefer)shake and confetti! 
Yes, drinking is everywhere in our world, very annoying. Also non-drinkers are everywhere, more common than you notice 
I started food & smoothie parties at home without alcohol in my twenties when my birthday fell into lent. They were lotsa fun.
What helped me, not only with drinking but with everything in life was: Be yourself and stay authentic. It’s perfectly ok to party all night sober, it’s perfectly ok to leave at 10 pm because the drunken ballaballa is annoying. The fear of missing out is an illusion, at least it was for me. The fear of missing sleep and health is real. IMHO you are doing great seeking for balance in being sober, living a good relationship and having a social life you are content with. Try out various settings, give yourself time, stay curious. I believe you can create a sober and fulfilling lifestyle. ODAAT