You can do it Sarah. It will not be easy - it will require more commitment and more courage than anything you’ve ever done before. But you can do it.
Come here, read up, learn, and engage. Keep talking, keep sharing. Make a list of all the pros of not drinking (no shame, no arguments, no trying to piece together your last night, etc). Keep that list close at hand.
Find an AA group, either in person (if they’re open in your area), or online. There are many groups in this thread:
Resources for our recovery
Most important: don’t ever; ever give up. You are a good person who has gotten lost a bit. You can find your way again. Keep calling out, connect with sober people, and build your sober strength. You will get there.
Never give up sister 
