I was one month sober

I was one month sober but my father died this week and I drank again I feel lost

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I’m very sorry for your loss. How long have you tried to stay sober and what tools and support do you have?

I was trying for month actually and started again for support I just have my boyfriend

First off, I am sorry for your loss. It is never easy losing a parent. I lost my mom to suicide 2 years sho on Valentine’s Day.

I remember drinking after her suicide. I thought it would make me numb and help me to get passed her death. It did not help. It honestly made her death worse. I would drink, and since alcohol is a depressant, I would become more upset and drink more to try and cope. It was a vicious cycle.

I finally decided to get sober and talk to someone about her death and how it effected me. Keeping your emotions bottled up inside isn’t healthy. It sounds like you have your boyfriend you could talk to? If not, find someone. Shoot, just post on here and you will have numerous people respond.

I hope you are able to move passed this and continue your sobriety.

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Maybe try a meeting they helped me with my parents deaths wish you well

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So sorry for your loss x

Thank you people even listen to you helping. I am going to try again and talk to someone about it I hope I can do it

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Welcome @Oblomov to the community.
I am so sorry you lost your father.

Like @NateRC (also very sorry about your mom), I started drinking again after my son’s death last year (OD). Grief can be overwhelming, to say the least. Once I stopped drinking again 6+ months ago, I was able to meet my sadness head on. This hasn’t made me any less sad, but it has made me exponentially more capable of handling it, and handling every other crappy thing that life might toss at me.
Being on this app, checking in daily, reading a lot of threads, has helped immensely. Give it a try. It might help you as well.
We are glad you are here.

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I could have written this. This was my experience. I had 30 days sober, when I had to make the call to end life support, and sat in her room as she slowly suffocated. She felt no pain, being in a medically induced coma. No, the pain was all on me. So that night I broke my sobriety, the first serious try in years. Took me 11 months to get back to the point where I wanted to try again. I had to, because I was in a slow spiral down. I wanted to, because I was going to lose everything, and no amount of booze could bring my mom back.

It’s been 647 days since my last drink.

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