I am an extremely anxious person. Definitely not one for being in a strange setting, surrounded by people I don’t know. So I feel so blessed to live in a time where I can attend NA meetings on Zoom. Once I figured out I could attend a meeting pretty much 24/7 if I wanted to… That was just so comforting.
A huge trigger for me when it comes to either relapsing or just my mental health in general is… being alone… Its the absolute worst. Sitting with my thoughts… it eats me alive. One day I will work on that. But I really need to get my using under control first.
The meetings have been amazing. I am so glad to have found this helpful and to be able to utilize this moving forward.
Moving onto day four of being clean in just a few short hours.
Good for you @Chikai! Meetings are great. Getting to meetings was a big turning point in my early sobriety. It makes a difference!
Sitting with thoughts is heavy for many people - you are not alone. We all have responsibilities - you do too: your self, your job, your daughter - and sometimes we worry (it’s only natural). Worries coming and going are a normal part of life for everyone, in recovery or not; as we grow we learn to “ride the wave” of our emotions in a grounded, stable way. (One of the reasons they seem so intense in early recovery is we’ve been burying them for so long, we aren’t used to how they feel normally, so it seems overwhelming.)
Have you tried Insight Timer? It has great guided meditations on mindfulness and self-care. I find that really helpful when I want some guidance on centring myself and staying grounded:
That’s sooo awesome !!! Hoping that once you get used to the Zoom meetings you will be able to find and go to an in person meeting. The NA program is awesome. I found an awesome AA group close by that I now consider family. I have a wonderful family but in some ways my group seems even closer because they understand how I think even better. Actually my Fellowship has members that are dual. Alcoholic/Addict. NA is based on the original AA program established in the 1930’s. As we say in AA. The program “Works if you Work it” Stick with it. I promise you won’t be disappointed. Really happy for you !
Sitting with thoughts… eats me alive , i can so relate with you, they say on average there are more then 60 thousands of these each day so if they are destructive and conflicting one can not live in peace, meditation helps but doing it without any thoughts is itself difficult