If you fail to plan, you plan to fail

Motivation
1

Hi Jay here. I have been unable to get even 24 hrs under my belt for months. But I will not give up, i will not surrender! Every night I go to bed drunk and oblivious, tasks and responsibilities piling up at home, time lost that I could be bonding with my son. In the morning I detest myself, yet I try to keep positive and believe I can beat this. All day I read quotes,read everyone success stories, listen to motivational speec

Once the thought kicks in or the bewitching hour comes around I give in immediately. I know I dont want to drink and that I am a happier more efficient person without it, yet I desire to just not feel myself. I have decided I am worthy of love and loving myself, I am worthy of friends, success and happiness. But it starts with me. I have misused the last 15 years of my life hating, comparing and berating myself.
I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!

So this is my plan:
:heavy_check_mark:check in here in the mornings and evenings
:heavy_check_mark:take a different route home from work and stay as late as I can so the liquor store will be closed. Also no cash, no debit card.
:heavy_check_mark:no more self hate thoughts, I will turn every negative talk into a positive about myself
:heavy_check_mark:I will have a plan and schedule for my days off with my son
:heavy_check_mark:finish reading Rational Recovery
:heavy_check_mark:if the desire comes I will not acknowledge it as my desire but that of healthy animal body that has been deprived of a poison it got used to.
:heavy_check_mark:I will take a bath, nap, or go for a power walk.

I will no longer accept the desire to drink as my own but that of a healthy animal body that has been getting poisoned unknowingly and now I take back control and will no longer poison it or give in to it.

Thank you for always listening and taking me back sober friends!

17 Likes
3

Thank you @Mephistopheles! I also have given up the belief that I can drink moderately or that I TRULY have any desire at all to drink. It’s a habit with physical, financial, emotional, etc., consequences. I will not drink again. As you said, no first drink, no problems.

If we can do that, everything else has a solution

8

Sounds like you have a solid plan, that’s awesome. Stay strong.

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10

My 375ml of brandy also cost me 6.00 dollars. But really its was costing me my life!

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11

Thank you! @Island-Girl

12

Your bottom shelf was expensive! Lol.

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14

Yeah no doubt. When people talk about having 1, I think 1 fifth.

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15

If you’re open to suggestions, for the turning negatives into positives piece I would suggest writing out some positives and sticking them in your wallet. Recovery is hard, when I got into that negative space about myself I needed to to have something physical to turn to.

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@CaptAZ same for me here. I have no limits with alcohol. And when I drink I have no limits with anything else.

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I am open to suggestions! Thank you @anon62920945! I will do this but instead of my wallet I will take a picture and make it my phone background. (I rarely go in my wallet)

19

Lol. I’ll get right on to lobbying for that. The 750ml was the little bottle, for when I was really broke. Otherwise I liked to buy the handle for $10

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21

Sounds good, this old guy just went to meetings met loads of people who understood my problem but if it going to keep you sober i wish you well . my main drink was vodka i used to go to several shops and after afew months i got a tick book going owed alot of shop owners then i moved to another area lol

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22

Stay strong. I need these reminders as well, that the desire to drink is actually irrational and fraught with negative consequences. You can do it! We all can.

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23

I can relate to that, the need to replace the thought that drinking will lead to something positive. I made that mistake almost daily for about 17 years despite learning the hard way the next morning every time.

1 Like