I'm feeling triggered

Just needed a save space where I could share my honest thoughts , this guy wants to hang out with me . I have been single for 9 months
Haven’t dated anyone no entanglement lmao
But he asked if we would hang out tonight I expressed I go to bed by like 9 every night I recently have quit smoking and drinking didnt get into detail about my past with drugs.
Anyway he asked questions , made a comment about well what happens ? A bottle of wine doesn’t seem like much damage.
Made me start thinking … the truth is … it’s not a problem … but I dont want it in my life anymore and that’s hard for me so it is a problem ya know. I also said I need to learn how to hangout with people alcohol free , it’s awkward for me. He made a joke… I makes me wanna cuss him out .
I am super annoyed , honestly I’m not ready to date I get annoyed so eazy. Then he said watch how much carbs you eat. We were talking about dinner than its was it for me . Like who says that and I’m 215 pounds and proud idgaf I’ve had three kids … I choose tacos not crack like f off you know…
Sorry had to get that off my chest…

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:blush::+1:

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Oh my, what an asshat. I get we don’t know what we don’t know…but discussions of being alcohol free or cutting back are everywhere these days. Strike 1 for ‘a bottle doesn’t seem like much damage’.

You expressed an honest situation/need…you want to learn how to hang out AF…he joked in response (again, I get it, discomfort = crack a joke)…but dig in a bit fella…ask some questions…strike 2.

Watch your carbs? Uh no. Strike 3 and he is out.

There are plenty of people out there and when the time feels right for you, I bet you will know it. And it is also cool to just do you.

No one needs to grow an adult human, that is their own job, not one you need. It seems to me your emotions were guiding you perfectly. :heart:

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Thank you…
Fkkkkk I’m like hell to the no ! Ain’t nobody got time for that shit.
I learned what I dont want … and I’m not sure why I always get so much pressure about being single like yeah I’m old school ya know . He will cross my path when hes ment to… I got 3 kids a cat and a fish. Honestly I’m enjoying my self and my own company. I know I’m not ready I still love my ex.
Anyway enough rambling

Thanks for listening and your response

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Wow girl… he sounds super disrespectful. I’m sooo glad u didn’t cave and fed into his bs. U deserve alot better, and I know u know that about urself. That was super rude and disrespectful of him smh :triumph:

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I don’t know about you, but my using dragged my self esteem, self confidence and self love. Being sober helped me build that all back up and damn if I will let anyone drag me back there. We are worth so much more than the crumbs some folks offer. Keep doing you. You are worthy of your love and care and kindness. And if someone fab falls in your lap some day, all the better, if not, you will be just fine. :heart:

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My soul needed to hear that.
Thank you so much.
And absolutely… I agree girl.
Much love

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Everything you want is normal here, and find people who can affirm your truths! As in, support and make you feel beautiful, safe. There are a lot of truths here, like I love my body, drinking is an issue and I need to protect myself.

I totally understand wanting to vent because he sounds like a giant red flag.

:dizzy:

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What an ass!! Good for you for not putting up with that shit.

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And you’re gorgeous!! Eat ALL the fucking carbs.

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Aww thank you darlin

Yes your wording it perfect and I thought so too

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So that seems really disrespectful of him in the first place. To attempt to goad you into drinking by saying one bottle won’t hurt when you flat out stated that you aren’t into that. Also making insensitive “jokes” to put you down shows his ego gets bruised rather easily. It seems to me he is quite immature and you seem to have dodged a bullet on this one.

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East van n8kki look that guy does not understand youre moving away from addictions. Stay true to yourself and stick with sobriety. Hes not in the same place as you. You are farther along the path. Leave him behind and keep going.

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I couldn’t agree with you more , I feel that :100:

Damn I hope you told him to lose your number lol. This guy sounds like a giant red flag with legs.

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I cussed him out and blocked his ass

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Jeezus. what a clown. No thanks. The only advice I have to give you is the next time don’t wait untill some douchebag tries to walk all over you three times, just cut the conversation off after the first unwelcome “joke”/attempted persuasion to go against your boundaries/comment on your body or nutrition. I wouldn’t take any of that shit and would let this guy know clearly what’s what before blocking him.

You stayed yourself sister. Don’t let no man mess with that. Much love.

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As I read on here a few days ago, no is a complete sentence. No, I don’t drink. F%^k that guy. Good for you!

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It’s his issue. Not yours.

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