I haven’t relapsed but im genuinely so worried for myself right now. Im trying to mess around on my phone to distract myself- which is difficult because im not even sure what im trying to distract myself from. I feel so awful. I don’t want to c*t again. I don’t know why i feel the way i do. Ever
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I’m so sorry to hear you feel that way. I’ve been there. Unable to stop but you just can’t.
Not sure what else you’re able to do right now but I would try anything you could to get you through this feeling. Eat. Sleep. Go outside. Go walk. Do an indoor exercise. Write. Draw. Read. Play solitaire. Play a new game on your phone. Whatever comes to mind.
Hope this moment passes for you quickly. 
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I’m with u. Fresh out of rehab I lasted 4 days. I can’t stop drinking. I am losing hope. I don’t want to be alive anymore. I never think this way. I am wortbess. I’m out of alcohol. I’m sick to my stomach. Throwing up bile
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Right now is when most would say to hit a meeting. Unfortunately that is not an option but there is online meetings. You tube has open talks where you can listen to people tell their story of how they got thru similar situations. It may help to distract you from you are feeling. No one is worthless. We are sick people trying to get better. We are doing this one day at a time. AA has free downloadable audio books that might help if you don’t want to read it. Whether you want a 12 step program or not it will help take you mind away from the obsession.
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Press on your profile icon and select the envelope to message someone by @username
I’m not doing well either, I am here if you would like to talk.
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we all have choices, we think we don’t bc of the voices in our head constantly telling us what we should be doing, it’s not easy it never was going to be but for every voice telling you the wrong thing there is another one telling you what’s best, it’s quiet but it’s there. it’s time to train the brain, if you can listen and accept what’s wrong it stands to reason you can listen and accept what’s right. Ignoring it rarely works it just gets louder but knowing it’s only a thought and not an action will help, have you always done everything you’ve been told NO I don’t think so, laugh out loud at the stupid suggestions let that voice know it’s pathetic and thank the other one for being there trying to help, praise it and believe it it will grow it will get louder and stronger it wants what you want so trust it. 
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I don’t think there are meetings out there, virtual or in person, for self harm. I know you meant well but drinking is obviously not the issue here so I don’t really understand your suggestion to the OP.
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Yes there is definitely a different culture of support for people grappling with self-harm. There are some hotlines that can help - the section “Hotlines and Text Lines” in the first post here has some:
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have you tried HALT? hungry, angry, lonely, tired. that might help you identify the underlying issue of why you want to self harm. i was having a hard time yesterday after work and once i went through that short life and found being lonely was the issue, i hopped into a meeting and it really helped.
building a toolkit to sustain you through these tough times is important. one woman said on here that she has a list of 60-something things to do before she uses. i thought that was so cool. x
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Thank you! It did im alright now
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Thank you very much! Im alright now
Omg thank you sm. I think about this next time a wave of emotions comes over me again#
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I’m with you Iv started my calendar over more times then I can count. Im on my 5th day angry scared and confused
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5days that’s good a brilliant start, your emotions will be messing with you. Stay strong you’ve got this. There are people here who listen it’s a great start. Being in touch with people about what’s going on inside mentally and physically
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I myself am not doing well either. I feel any day now it’s just gonna happen. The only thing that stops me is my kids. They need me. I’m sure ppl need you too. Hang in there. If I can do it so can you!!
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I’m sorry to hear this my friend. You have to remember you’re never alone when you get into recovery. Yes, it is good to distract yourself but I can say from my experience the only thing that truly can distract me from letting my addiction getting the upper hand is helping someone else. That works for me everytime. Call someone in recovery and tell them whats going on and tell them what can we do for someone in need and just go do it. Stay strong my friend and good luck
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