So its been a very emotional week and holy fuck i havnet wanted a drink this badly in a long fucking time. I miss someone a lot who passed years ago and i have very messy feelings about, ny therapy appointment was canceled (will have one on Wednesday this weej tho), and its just been a lot.
However im doing what i can to nit cave in. Ive been hitting up lots of meetings, getting coffee with a friend in the program tomorrow morning, i have an appointment with my therapist coming up, i have no access to alcohol and as a broke college student its not really an option anyways, and i have so many good reasons to not drink. I love my life rn and i don’t want to lose what i have. Also im on my period so my emotions are wayy worse than normal, so before i do anything drastic im honna wait a week lol.
Im just sad. Im lonely, im tired, i keep crying on and off over someone whos been gone a long fucking time and i should be over the loss by now, my friends have all been busy and i know thats fine but i feel like they dont care about me cause my brain is an asshole, its just a lot of feelings. I dont think i deserve the amazing life i have today, i dont think im a good enough person to be this blessed, i feel like an imposter.
Anyways the tldr is: ive been going through a lot emotionally this past week, i want a drink, i have good reasons not to, and ive decided that im not going to drink tonight, im going to sleep and ill reacess tomorrow. One day at a time right?
I’m so sad for you, grief is a difficult thing, it has no timeline, things can be going ok and then it’ll grab you out of nowhere, it’s a sign of how much we loved them and still do love them.
Drinking won’t help tho, please don’t do that, alcohol is a depressant so it won’t work, plus you’ll get the regrets.
The person you’ve lost would want you to live your best life.
Look after yourself, get plenty of sleep and good food and limit screen time, stay hydrated and get outdoors for at least a little tiny bit each day.
Hey friend. Way to go to put it out here! Just wanted to let you know, it’s okay to still be sad, even after such a long time. Grief comes and goes in waves. I always find it helps to give it the space it deserves for a little while and acknowledge the sadness and feeling of loss. It’s okay to feel this way and still be firm on not drinking. I know you got this. You’ve done this many times before and you also know, it will be better in a little while. Sending you hugs
Hey just to say hang in there. After a year for some reason I let everything become a reason why I needed a break and to have a drink. I almost convinced myself I needed a blow out to start sobriety again. It would of been the shittiest choice I would of made in a while. Each day I woke up feeling glad I hadn’t drank but during the day the thought was screaming at me again to ‘treat myself’ hang in there lovely. The feeling passed for me after a week to two and I settled back down.
Life can be absolutely exhausting and overwhelming but you not alone in that feeling. Youv done so well and alot of people are super proud too. Love yourself and give yourself a break. Sleeps movies day trips basically give yourself some time and love. Your feeling better soon x
Hello @Megan3. Thanks for sharing and venting. Just know, you are not alone on this. Even after 5 years sober…I find myself opening my brothers bottle of vodka and smelling it…I know I shouldnt be doing this but in a way it helps… I’m instantly repelled by it. Kinda feels like I have to throw up…
You are definitely worth living this life. Grieving is a long and difficult thing to go through. So please cry when you have to and please dont forget to be happy as well… sometimes we get lost in the past and forget we still have a future ahead of us. Feeling lonely and sad is also part of the process. Keep up the good work…wish you the best.
Glad you’re still here and did the right thing by admitting your feelings and putting it all out in the open. Staying connected helps so much bc we all get it. Looks like you’ve really thought about the others options you can utilize to keep you in check.
Emotions, and grief specifically are a tricky thing. I wasn’t sober when my grandmother passed and never truly grieved her until one night, 5 years after she passed, I finally let it out. Same with my dog. He’s been gone 4 years and I still have my moments over him. Those hormones definitely play a major role. Most months are fine but every so often I feel like I’m falling apart and idk why or what I did differently to cause it.
Keep hitting those meetings and stay in touch with us like minded people. We’re here for you and will see you thru this Another day won, not another day one
Another day won, not another day one 