My first holiday in 3 years was cancelled due to the other 2 I was going with getting in a fight at the last minute and refusing to go. It’s not an option to go on my own (I don’t drive and I didn’t pay for accommodation). I took the week off work unpaid to go, and I feel like the others got so wrapped up in their own negative emotions towards each other (both are stubborn too and won’t back down over the smallest things) that neither have considered my feelings at all. They are both refusing to go because of something so so small and neither seem to care that their stubbornness isn’t just hurting each other. So now I’m left with a whole week off with little money and nothing to do, whilst in a bad mood that has me completely unmotivated to get out and find something positive to distract myself. Basically I’m in a funk. And this funk is the EXACT mood that usually drives me to my vices, and now I have a whole week to do nothing but feel that mood. This is the strongest urge I’ve had since starting my sober journey. And the reasons why I went sober just don’t matter right now. Its like I’m on auto pilot. But I have enough awareness to know that I shouldn’t do this and need to be strong.
Could you call your job this week and go back in since vacation got cancelled?
You made a wise move coming here for support. Try something new each day whether it be food, an exercise, or meditation. Check out Insight Timer for all sorts of meditations its good for your mental
It can be an urge, or it can be a test. You get to choose.
You can make the most of this bad situation, or you can dwell on it. You get to choose.
Your friends chose to ruin the original plan. You get to choose the new plan.
So you took leave without pay, and have a limited amount of money to see you through. Make the most of your “staycation”. Go hit a matinee movie, since they’re usually cheaper than evening and weekends. Cook something youve never cooked before. Hit a museum. Hit the library and check out a book you’ve always wanted to read Take a hike in nature…or sleep…get some glorious sleep.
Accept the situation for what it is: a disappointing inconvenience, and then make the most of what you have to work with.
It’s better to light a single candle, than to sit and curse the darkness.
This was an amazing, thought out response. And I want to say how much I appreciate that you wrote all this for me. I have just taken a nap and reading this reply (and the others) has me feeling more determined! I’m gonna chuck on some fun music, and dance away in my house to let off some steam and then have myself a movie night at home with some yummy snacks. Then tomorrow I’ll make another plan. Thank you
Unfortunately not as its shift work! But I think this may work to my advantage as I’ve put out there that I am available for shifts should anyone need (and Christmas burnout is REAL at my work) and so now I’m more hesitant to drink in case someone does need a shift covered (and I really really love my job)
Thanks Cjp. I’m going to Google some ideas for something new to try on a low budget I think
You are handling this very tough situation beautifully. Very well done.
Naps are hugs we give to ourselves.
Feeling overwhelmed and stressed.
Maybe that’s a good thing. Survival comes in doing things that are good for you even though you may not feel like doing good things