I’ve been addicted to heroin since I was 16, and I’m 22 now. Much of the time I have spent sober but constantly fighting my addiction. I have struggled over the years with relapsing under stress. And now I just broke up with my boyfriend of 6 years. The relationship was toxic, but it is still so painful to walk away… I’m really scared of where my emotions are going to take me. I have no friends other than him, he has kept me isolated from friends for years. That’s probably why it took me so long to break up with him, I am scared of being alone, even if that meant I was treated like garbage. I’m just scared of relapsing again… but talking about it helps.
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I’m here for u girl. Addiction is a battle, I’m still fighting it too. I know loss, or emotional stuff is a big trigger, do u have a support network? I’m here if u need to talk! Keep going u can do this 
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I know exactly how you feel. I was engaged to a man, living with him and it was unfortunately toxic. On both ends. I loved him and I know he did to. But towards the end we were hating each other. Fighting our own addictions. It’s so hard to leave and I understand. It’s still hard and it’s been almost a year. I would suggest having a plan. Find support where ever u can. As meetings, smart meetings, maybe see a psychologist. Join a gym, sign up to a short course, join a library, these are ways you can meet like minded people perhaps. It’s hard. Start creating the life that you deserve that you want. You will learn a lot about yourself. You will start liking yourself because you will realise how strong you really are. And then people will start noticing that quality. Goodluck. Here if you need to chat. I’m on the same boat. You are not alone.
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We are all on your side. You are a survivor. Just be strong, patient, and honest.
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Hang in there girl and try and look at it from this perspective, if you were to relapse due to the breakup you’d be letting him and the demon win. You’re strong and can do this and by staying sober and facing your emotions you’ll come out stronger and wiser in the end! Hang in there girl, we’re all here for you! 
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Sending love!
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I went through the same thing. I came out of my 5 year relationship with no friends and I was terrified about being alone. It sucks, but there is hope. Try going to NA. I go and I can say that I met a lot of great friends that way. Its gives you something to do every day and is an awesome healthy outlet for your emotions. No one judges you and its nice to have people you can relate to. I know its hard to start going to NA, but I promise if you give it a real chance, you won’t regret it. Praying for you. If you ever need to talk, i’m here 
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Thank you all so so much… I’m still going strong. And I’m feeling better every day.
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.Before my first serious girlfriend and I broke up I honestly did NOT realize how bad it would be — it’s like someone died. And it’s OK to treat it like that and to mourn. It sucks, and it’ll hurt like hell, and you’ll cry a lot for a WHILE. Just know it’s OK to be sad and cry and feel like you’re broken into a million pieces on the floor. Even if it’s months and months later and you think about it and start bawling all over again when you thought you were over it. That’s OK. There’s no “right way” to feel about a breakup and no “right time” to be completely fine and move on. But then at some point you’ll be going to bed without crying once all day. And then you’ll go a week without being sad about it. Then you’ll realize it’s all OK. And that’ll be a great day… I too cannot stand being alone it’s funny though during my addiction that was one of the best things I was good at isolating myself a lot of people that walked out of me in my life I thought they were being the bad person but really it was just driving them away. I’ve been on this website now since the 28th and what you wrote to me was by far the nicest thing anybody has said to me thank you beautiful.
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I went through something similar two years ago. Please make an effort to be around healthy people. Isolating is the worst possible thing for you right now. Go to meetings, go to coffee shops, the library, seek out healthy company of any kind, just don’t be alone with your brain right now! Also, get numbers at meetings and call people, it doesn’t matter what you talk about or how well you know them, just call. You can do this.
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