I keep going back and fourth and I’m tired of it. I took suboxone this morning after only 12 hours of cessation and I’m dealing right now, it’s not a cure all by any means imo but it is helping curve the cravings… I’m still asking myself how I got here and I still don’t know the answer, I may never know, but I did get myself here and I’m gonna get myself out, heres to the next 12 hours of sobriety, I’m taking it 1 hour at a time and sticking to it… I’ll check in very frequently to hold myself accountable, I’ve gone 30 days by using this app and I told myself I was good to buy some vicodin one time and I wouldn’t slip, that was so far from true… That was about 6 months ago…heres to the next 12! Positive vibes only
I’ve had to use the minute counter on my home screen of this app before… And 12 hours wasn’t easy. Minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day.
8 of those 12 hours I spent sleeping, but I took the suboxone this morning and I feel fine right now (actually feel like I took some oxycodone which surprises me in a good way) I really wish I had access to sole kratom because I’ve used kratom to quit very easily, it’s a partial opioid agonist as well but it doesn’t last nearly as long as subs do, and it’s natural, and not considered an opiate, but I know it helps, it’s a miracle substance and once I can get my hands on it I’m not taking this suboxone crap ever again, but for the time being it’s really helping. I’ve set my timer to hours, and I am almost at 14 hours!
It’s crazy how much the hours count! I keep refreshing for encouragement - only 2 days in, but that feels HUGE right now!
20 hours down!!! I’m so proud of myself! With the help of subs and Kratom of course but I feel like that’s better than pill seeking and risking incarceration and doing more harm than good!