Recently in an AA Meeting. This was shared. Addicts have this to look forward to. Jail, being institutionalized or death. Personally I have been in jail for being drunk. Institutionalized for not wanting to live. Death would be next option.
A couple weeks ago we had company. Two brothers with one in his 70s. He has struggled for many years with drugs and alcohol. At one point we discussed I had days sober and he had months. Recently I had 5 1/2 months he had 80 days. Couple of days ago he was found dead in his car. I do not know all details. I do know his addiction was the cause. He is now gone. The heartache he has left behind for his family will continue for a long time. My attempts to end it all haunts me a bit as thinking of those left behind and what they would have to go through was never in the equation of my actions.
I am soon to reach 6 months sober. Fear of complacency is on my mind. I must stay forever diligent which takes hard work. Staying sober is a full time job.
Ur story is sooo sad I really feel for the man who passed and his family Whenever i hear of something tragic like this happening, its always a reality check for me. You spoke about complacency and thats a fear of mine also. I never want to get to that point where recovery is 2nd or 3rd to other things in my life. Recovery must come 1st so that i can keep the blessings in my life today. Im glad that ur here and i am excited for u to hit 6 months
You can do it. Just remember why you started. You don’t want to be on day one like me. Id give anything to see 6 months. ik it’s possible but seems like just a dream.
Thanks for sharing this. I often get those random evil thoughts of,
“one more time”
“look at how far you’ve come”
One of the reasons I’m thankful for this app. Certain times I’ve come here and read or saw something that gives me exactly what I need to keep going. All it takes is ONE TIME
Again, thank you for sharing this. Together we can do this
I’m so sorry for your loss L! It sure is an eye opener.
I’ve done jail, but have been lucky to avoid institutions and death so far. I had thoughts of ending it all too. Very selfish act but my addiction kept me from considering what it would have done to my loved ones. It doesn’t haunt me any longer because I know now that I wasn’t a bad person, I was just sick.
I can’t afford complacency. I know I have a relapse in me but I honestly don’t think I have another recovery.
Really proud of you and the hard work you’re putting into your recovery.
In early sobriety its a struggle sometimes but the road does get easier to walk take it from a old timer ,get up every morning sun or rain ( Scotland mostly rain lol) thank god im alive and count my blessings what ive got and achieved in my sobriety then just get on with my day . spoke at prisons over my years sober and there for the grace of god , dont be afraid be happy
I also worry about complacency and taking for granted this gift I’ve received. It takes work to keep that greediness in the forefront and not allow it to fade to anything but the most important aspect of my life…
This is a great wake up call to all of us that we need to understand that that one next drink could be the final nail in the coffin.
My condolences to you, his family and friends. A sad way to go, alone in your car.
Thank you. I appreciate that. I have prayed for his family few times today. I’ve known him as long as I have known my husband as friend of his. I have seen his so many struggles long before mine. He could never make sobriety a permanent solution. Always looking for that high.
Addicts either get sobered up, or covered up.
Stopping drinking is just the start, if you don’t have a program and work it to the best of your ability, you’re just a dry drunk and will probably either be drunk again or end up dead by your own hand.
Meetings, meetings, meetings is the answer; from these a worthwhile and productive sobriety is born. &
I feel like something is coming up short in this post, I can’t quite put my finger on it.
I’ve heard this saying (jails, institutions and death) as part of Step 1 discussions. But the idea that we can live, to use another quote “happy, joyous and free” seems to run counter to “I must stay forever diligent which takes hard work. Staying sober is a full time job.”. Somewhere in the Big Book, after the description of step 10, maybe, is the observation that “we have ceased fighting anything or anyone, including alcohol.”
I was a booze fighter for years, decades. And in sobriety for awhile as well, this persisted. But one day, after a few months of abstinence and working a few steps, getting into fellowship, I was suddenly aware that I hadn’t had an obsessive thought about alcohol in a couple of days. And after my fourth and fifth steps (that took a long time to complete maybe 6 or 8 months), that feeling of being at ease in the world grew stronger. From considering that statement about not fighting to be a lie or an extreme case for fanatics, to living it, that was huge for me. And it did happen for me! I don’t really know how or when, but somewhere along in working the steps, I was granted a release and it has persisted.
I hope that happens for you. I trust that with faith in a higher power and working the steps honestly, that it can. Blessings on your house .
I tried for years to quit. Mostly did not make it to even 3 days, let alone 2. Had my trigger friend that would laugh each time i tried, cause he said trying dorsnt count. He was so wrong. I knew in my head that you cannot stop if you dont try. Took me another 2 years of trying after i left him before i succeeded. The sober tracker is actually what helped me most. I got tired of resetting it over and over again. Seeing me make it to 3 days, then a week, 2 weeks! You can imagine how accomplished I felt after 30 days! 3 months! 6 months! 1 year! August 1st was my 2 year mark. I still get tired, overwhelmed…I have a disabled daughter…life isnt easy. But theough all this I have learned to be overprotective of my mental status. No one is coming to save me or us. If I do not feel well mentally, I make sure to stop moving and take a mental time out. Whether that is sleeping extra, wtching tv, or if none of that helps find someone new or different to emerge myself in. Baking, walking my dogs, swimming, riding my horse, painting, anything to get me back to being balanced. I stay away from those that do my old addiction, anyone triggering me. I watch them and see how senseless the drug is and how it literally makes them run in circles and changes who they really are, and that keeps me away from it all. Besides, I do not want to reset that timer back to day 1. But you cannot get to day 30 without day 1. You cannot get to day 60 without day 30? You see? And yes, it is so worth it.
I really feel for the man who passed and his family 
Whenever i hear of something tragic like this happening, its always a reality check for me. You spoke about complacency and thats a fear of mine also. I never want to get to that point where recovery is 2nd or 3rd to other things in my life. Recovery must come 1st so that i can keep the blessings in my life today. Im glad that ur here and i am excited for u to hit 6 months 
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