Well, this is new to me. I guess I’ll just keep typing, and see what happens
I’m not not necessarily asking for help, maybe advice on what I should do or who I should talk too
I should start by saying. I’m quite young, 23. I get a lot of weird looks when I say I’m an addict. Or well, in recovery I should say.
Growing up, in not so great areas. With parents who were quite distant, I started to make bad decisions.
Had my first drink at 12, first cigarette at and first joint at 13
By the time I was 14 I was regularly drinking and doing coke, by 15 I was an addict. Drinking, coke, meth.
I spent the next two years living on the streets with dealers and users. Hadn’t been to school in a long while, to the point where my teachers actually forgot about me lol
When I turned 17, one of my old friends from school happened to walk past and barely recognized me. She told one of my school counsellors, who then started looking for me with the police. They found me pretty quickly, not like I was hiding.
They brought me to the hospital, I got checked out, they sobered me up and stuck me back in a classroom.
You can imagine how it felt being 17 in a classroom just starting to detox, right?
It was fucking terrible
I managed to stay a couple days but then I dissipeared again. It was a Monday when I was in school, by Thursday I was gone, by Friday I had overdosed.
I don’t remember how I ended up at the hospital.
After spending about a week in the hospital, they discharged me, but sent me for a psych evaluation. I never showed up.
My parents, really didn’t seem to care what happened to me, treated me like I wasn’t there anyway. They never tried to help. There was one who did though.
It was one of my teachers actually. She took it upon herself to find programs to help, therapy, rehabs, detox. When I showed up at school after my OD, she pulled me into her office and made me an offer. I accept her help, and she’ll give me another chance at school. (I only went to school that day to tell them I was dropping out).
I discided to accept. So off I went to this program for at risk youth.
I did the detox, went to therapy. And discided to try school again.
When I got back into school I was 18, and trying grade 10 again, (actually super embarrassing).
I felt like it was pretty hopeless, everyone my age was about to graduate. I was known as the school junkie, I struggled with every class, got diagnosed with a learning disability.
There was a point where everything turned around though, as cliche as it sounds. A girl, turned everything around for me.
I was having a smoke when she approached me, she was on the school cheer team.
All she did was ask what my name was, although I’m pretty sure she knew. I knew who she was, I was supposed to be in her grade. Pretty sure she’s watched what happened with me.
A few days later she offered to help me with my English and math classes, cause someone told her I was dislexic.
So she was helping me for a few weeks, she took a lot of flack from everyone in her grade for helping the junkie. Never seemed to faze her though.
Because of her I passed grade 10 and 11. But by the time I got into grade 12, she’d been graduated for 2 years.
She was still helping me, her parents even got to know me, and they fed me, bought me clothes. Sometimes even let me crash on their couch (I stopped going home in grade 11. Too toxic of an environment)
When I got into grade 12, I actually asked her out on a date. Which she actually responded with “finally”.
She got made fun of by her friends, not only is she dating a guy in high school, but a recovering addict. Still, she stayed.
By the time I graduated high school, I had gained almost 80 lbs of weight, hadn’t had a drink or any drugs in 2 years.
But after high school I had to figure out what the fuck I’m doing now, my girlfriend was a makeup artist who made good money. She let me move in with her, I lived off her for about 6 months.
It was difficult to find a job being a 19 year old with addictions, so I walked up to a construction site and talked to one of the concrete guys.
He walked me onto site and I talked to the Forman, he gladly gave me a job, all the PPE and told me to come back tomorrow at 7 am.
So I did,
I could go on about my journey in construction, but I’ll keep it brief.
They trained me as a carpenter, got my apprenticeship, then challenged the red seal, and got certified.
Then they gave me a shot at working with cranes. Started as a rigger, they trained me and got me my advanced rigging ticket. Right now, they let me get my apprenticeship for crane operating.
Now I’m 23, one red seal, a ticket and an apprenticeship. And been dead sober for almost 5 years, I think.
But even now, I still struggle. Every fiber of my being wants to fall back and drink, maybe hit a bump.
But at the same time, I have a great job, make good money. And we’re getting married in 3 weeks.
Not sure what to do. Or if there’s even anything to do.
Do I just keep riding it out? Or is there someone or some program I can talk too?
If you actually read this whole thing. I’m sorry for rambling on and on, this probably makes very little sense lol, but thank you for listening.
If there’s any advice, or you know of a program that might help? I’m located in the lower mainland of British Columbia.
