Anger caught me off guard today…woke up off…kinda feel shitty. Had some guy flip me off at a light for not stopping on a yellow light…I kinda lost it…road rage incident that could’ve gone south real quick. Im glad I caught it on time and chilled the fk out. Second…I dont even want to say… I’ve had a nice couple of weeks so far. Seemed like the year was finally getting good (in fukn October, pretty much November). I haven’t done any work for my sobriety… besides staying sober… is that enough?
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That is a question only you can answer for yourself. For ne, getting sober went far past not just drinking. I read everything I could get my hands on that was about addiction, alcoholism, recovery, self help. I went to Aa for 4 years, participate in Recover Dharma now.
Why did I do all that?..i didnt want to just quit drinking, i had serious things about myself I need to “fix”.
Everyone that “works” on sobriety…works on it differently.
Do you thinl you need to do more?
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I can only speak from my own experience. There have been times that i have put my all into recovery on a daily basis, and then times when i havent done muxh besides not use drugs or drink. I definitly feel the difference. Usually when im doing the bare mininium in recovery, im not necessarily happy. I tend to get quite irritable, impatient, moody and agitated bcuz things dont go the way id like them to go. This usuaply causes cravings to increase. On the other side of it, when Im really focused on recovery and doing the things i need to do to live a happy, sober life, i am much more content and experience much less irritability, worry, fear or self centeredness.
If u feel like something is missing in ur recovery, then maybe adding something to it would help 
Some daily readings, meetings, Its really up to u tho and how u want ur life experience to be
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I completely get this , I’ve needed to up my meeting s I was feeling in a bit of a funk recently. nothing specific just as you said a bit irritable and people were getting on my nerves for no reason and impatience setting in .I’m not comfortable with these internal feelings and attitude s and I know I need to take positive affirmative action . My stinking thinking might lead to drinking so I caught it and asked for help from my fellows also been talking to my HP more and praying for guidance patience and serene good thoughts and wishes towards others . It seems to be working because I’m a lot happier and positive this week . I know when I’m good because I talk to people at bus stops and sit with them on the bus when I’m not ok I don’t talk to them and think bad things about them 
hopefully I’m learning and growing into a better human 
As I give to the world the world gives to me 
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Yes and no. White knuckling through sobriety is good insofar as we avoid the consequences of active addiction.
But it’s not so good if we’re walking around each day miserable to ourselves and others while craving.
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Honestly, I’m the type of person that gets bored really quick. I like the saying “less is more” if you get what I mean…
I dont really crave much anymore. I had an anger problem before an addiction problem so my anger doesnt really make me crave. I usually have it under control…but this year has beat the shit out of me and I’m just angry about it. I just need to man up and keep pushing foward. 🫸
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If it works, keep on that path
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Read through your post history and felt I needed to ask How are you doing?
I care.
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Im alright. Just letting life take its course. Doing a little better with my emotions. Got some “good” news that I was not expecting . Went to play some golf today after a 16 hour shift. I guess I wasn’t paying attention to the ground and stepped on a tree root…fukd up my ankle pretty bad. Had to go to the ER…they gave me drugs 
idk if i should even take them. I haven’t slept in over 30 hours so i should probably take my pain Meds…its scary though. Even though I was never into pills, I’m scared to use any type of drug…
Thank you for asking and caring. Sorry for ranting.
Sorry to hear about your ankle, I hate the pain of twisting them and have done it enough times to know that I do! I am normally not one to dispense medical advice but in this case: I swear by RICE (Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation) and I have never used pain pills. Maybe try RICE first? You can even do it while you sleep, just put a pillow under your feet. Not a very natural sleeping position, but when you’re tired enough of the pain…
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Ima give that a try.
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