Yesterday I hit 14 days sober…. My in laws had my daughter for a play date. When she got home she proceeded to tell me what a terrible person I am because her nana said I have a drug problem. She asked me why I can’t just follow the law and why I’ve been to jail three times. (Truth of the matter I’ve been arrested twice) I was completely devastated. She’s only six. My heart was and still is broken. I don’t want to be that person to withhold my kid from her family…. But it’s not fair to her either to hear her family talking so horribly about me. They swore they didn’t say anything to her but my girl isn’t a liar 
I’m very overwhelmed and I’m scared about going to court today. I’ve been sending my hopes and fears to my higher power and I’ve leaned heavily on my sponsor and my group here in my hometown. I’m going to be a nervous wreck all day just waiting for this appearance. My emotions are all over the place and I could use a little support 
everytime I build myself back up from the depths of my shame, I’m met with an urgent reminder of what a terrible person I am. Whether that’s from my family, my in-laws (through my daughter) or even from just having to look myself in the mirror. I’ve never felt so low in all my life but… I’m working on myself and continuing my sobriety. This has been the hardest job I’ve ever had.
This is very tough and is of course very upsetting to hear that your daughter got those messages from ur family. Its hard not to feel down obviously but use this as motivation to keep going. Prove them wrong 
we as drug addicts and alcoholics are not terrible people. We have made poor choices but that doesn’t determine our character as human beings. Continue to take that next right action girl 
And I just want to reiterate again… lol
YOU ARE NOT A TERRIBLE PERSON hugs
Shae, all of this will pass but right now it just f-n sucks. I have had my lumps too, as many of us have.
Remembering we can control only our actions and attitudes in life helps. What people think and say is often driven by their lack of knowledge of our disease. Sad but true.
As long as we keep sobriety first, everything else just works. As you and I know, if we don’t it all falls to shit.
Hugs to ya.
Try to focus on one challenge at a time. One day at a time. Nothing more can be done for the family turmoil so truly leave with your higher power. We tend to pray about things and say we are leaving it in our higher powers hands but then we keep picking at it. We keep talking to people about it, trying to fix it or running over the woulda, could, shoulda scenarios endlessly in our heads. If we keep picking at it are we REALLY leaving it to our higher power? Nope. Try to focus your energy on what you must do to recover and stay sober. You can do this Shae
Let that be the motivation to change the past is already set in stone but the future is yours too control. I believe you can do it. Good Luck in Sobriety and Life. Take Care
Where did Sir Edmund Hillary (first recorded person to climb Mt. Everest) start?
The bottom.
With work, determination, and will, where did he end up?
Literally on top of the world.
So you’re feeling pretty low right now, which is understandable. Stop looking down. That’s not where your future lies. Look up, and keep climbing. One day your daughter will look up and say “that’s my mom!”.
