Maybe you can use this time to figure that out
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It sucks when your trying to gain someone’s trust, and they won’t listen or believe anything you have to say 
It’s hard, yes. Often with trust, it takes time. And trust is something you must show them rather than tell them. Trust is built through action. Daily. Whether small or big. Trust is not something we can expect, but rather it is a gift or reward for our honest, humble, generous, kind and loving consistent behaviour. Hope this helps. Wish you well in your sobriety. 
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If anything, I have plenty of time. I really appreciate the input. Everybody’s responses have been extremely helpful in putting things into perspective. Thank you.
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How are holding up?
Today, I woke up and am feeling it pretty hard. Keeping busy at the gym, doing house renovations and studying but even my routine is getting monotonous. Starting to feel like every day is exactly the same. Trying to bat these negative feelings away since they’re of no use. Just sometimes easier said than done.
I can see the light at the end of the tunnel but feels so far away sometimes.
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Keep at it, it’s worth it.
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I think that’s pretty par for the course in the beginning. But things will improve for you the longer you stay sober. Your perspective right now is probably a bit skewed because of withdrawal, just know that your negative feelings are probably a result of that skewed perspective, and most are probably not an accurate reflection of reality. 
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Hi team I hope everybody is doing well. I’m writing in at 89 days sober!!! This is my second sobriety but first in AA, I am really like it and believe if I’m still sober it is because of AA and the work I’m doing. I can see I have grown a lot.
On love- I met my former bf at 21 and we fell hard and we fell fast. We had a lot of ups and downs but overall a relationship built on mutual love commitment and desire1 but my alcholism caused a lot of issues over the years. It scared him and upset him.
On may 30 I had my last drunk and a few days later after drunk texting my ex and being annoying I called explaining I was finally getting professional help in a program. We agreed about a month before to take time apart bur he said he was proud of me and supported and loves me. Thst he’s still open Sfv has hope bit to focus on recovery during our agreed upon time apart. He told me that he believes it will work out and that in a few months after seeing serious recovery he would be open to a relationship and future. We have been through a lot together. He used the word hope and open and hopeful.
I’ve talked to men as friends and seen what else is out there from a distance and I still don’t want anybody else. I know he is still open too. I wrestle with the guilt of wanting and wishing I got sober sooner when I had him.
And no I didn’t get sober for him I got sober for me.
But from an outside view, would y’all be open? I believe if he wanted to move on he would have.