There are a lot of folks in here with days in three digits. Is there a group for those of us who can’t make two digits. In the last two years I have made it five days 5 times. 6 days 2 times. 7 days once. 8 days once and 17 days once with great effort. I failed on 6 days today. I guess I will need to read more books and figure it out… Maybe I will get there.
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What have you been doing to try to maintain sobriety?
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With each attempt you learn. Don’t quit trying
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Listening to audiobooks about the subject and watching my sobriety counter app.
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Have you tried meetings? There’s a group of people at AA that would love to help you stay on track. The newcomer is the most important person in the rooms. You’ll be amazed at the outpouring of help you’ll receive.
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Joing here was a great idea. My suggestion, be active here. Read as much as you can and participate. Maybe join a program like SMART or AA.
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Many times when I tried to quit in the past, I thought that if I went through the motions, a, b ,c, that it was the secret and it would lead to sobriety. It wasn’t until this last attempt that it developed into a mind set. It’s not the motions that make you sober alone, it’s a way of thinking about your addiction. When you understand what’s going on in your brain, then the motions of sobriety make sense. Don’t give up! Big hugs 
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Everyone starts with day 1, no matter how long they’ve been sober now. When I got sober in AA I remember being at a meeting with like 60 days and a few people picked up chips with over 40 years. It was eye-opening in a good way to see that long term sobriety was not only possible, but happened more frequently than I thought. I haven’t picked up a drink and will always remember that meeting.
The first time I tried to get sober I hung out with people who had similar time as me. We all relapsed and 2 of them are now dead.
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There is such a huge variety of people here at all stages of their journey. Being unable to string together however many number of days (yet!) doesn’t make you or anyone else a loser. The fact that we are all here shows we want to do things differently! That is a huge first step and one that many people don’t ever come round to.
Being willing and able to put that into practice is such an individual thing in some ways - but also the core of it is the same for all of us.
Reading books to gain knowledge is definitely one way to go. As is joining a recovery group as suggested above. Of course they are not mutually exclusive! Lots of suggestions on those kind of things here >> Resources for our recovery
We all have to find the path that works for us. For me, reading this forum (a lot) - focusing on the similarities, seeing myself in the struggles and successes of others and building sober connections - made such a big difference. It helped me open up to new ways of doing things and think about life differently. Still does 
I hope you can find strength in the success of others and a way to meet yourself with compassion in the times you feel you are falling short 
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This is cool and makes sense. My Dad is a quitter in the 4 Digits and I do talk to him and respect his opinion. It also makes sense to take advice from those who have gone through it and and have succeeded. I just “feel” there is a difference between those who have made it and those of use who haven’t. When I hear “I am sober 457 days” it is so far away from me that I can’t relate. It’s like “good for you, you made it”. I am still here “not making it”.
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Don’t even think about that. Its wasted energy. Think about your day today, everyday. You can do it.
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Maybe try a meeting they will help wish you well
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I haven’t made it. One day at a time friend. Made it to 821 so far if which I am proud but it can and will be over just like that if I stop working my sobriety. As soon as I think i have made it I know I will be back to square one. Work your sobriety. It does take more than listening to audiobooks. Use support. Like us. Use us.
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Hi @mcmxlv, I can sense your feeling of failure and not belonging, of separation from what you perceive as better people, people who “made it”. This is not so. We are each and every one of us making it for ourselves only, one day at a time. This is true.
Secondly. Nothing good will come of a losers group. You are not a loser, neither is anyone else who relapses. It doesn’t matter what I say, but as long as you keep yourself in this mindset, you will not become a long time sober person. Long time sobriety for me is achievable because I am working on building a Iife for myself that I can STAND being sober in. That I even like. An important part of that is coming to some self-respect. Liking and appreciating myself. I have notoriously bad self-image. Not because I’m so exceptionally bad and stupid. But I was raised like this, and later I continued with this inner attitude. And it kept me nice and stuck. Drunk, unhappy, a loser. a piece of shit the world revolves around. it’s not easy, but I’m working on this attitude. It’s more than an attitude, it’s actual sick thinking, a defect in the soul. I don’t know if you can relate. But when I was in early sobriety as you are now, I looked for meaning and something relateable in what people with higher sober numbers told me and what I read. I saw possibilities and chances in what I was told and what I could see. We are none of us losers here. We all have a chance.
Much love
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You said what I wanted to say, but more elegantly than I ever could @Faugxh 
An ‘early days of our journey’ thread would be fine, I too remember seeing people with long time and thinking they were something different from me, so a group with something in common may be useful, but ‘losers’ is not the way to think it. I was 6 months on this app struggling like fuck. And the several years before that were no picnic either. Plenty of people with long time now struggled for even longer drinking. We do remember what it was like. It was too awful to forget.
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No one is a looser unless you give up completely and give in. We all had to start somewhere and usually out of desperation. Most of us that have put in some time started at day one and barely got a few days before caving. When relapses happen we have to analyze the relapse and plan what to do if it happens again. Being mindful of ourselves and how to avoid it. Sometimes we dont have enough tools in the tool box or enough support to keep us accountable. Look into a new daily routine filling your days with exersize,cooking,hobbies,reading, finding new friends etc… Be the person you want to be .
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I’m 830 days, I haven’t made it, i assure you. If i think that way, I’ll be drinking tomorrow. As mentioned previously, it’s only one day that matters, and that is today. Today is what counts. Regardless of how many days a person has, they are still proactive in staying sober.
I understand how you feel though, I couldn’t get past double digits for a loooooong time and it felt so futile and out of reach to get even beyind a week. But it eventually happened. And that was primarily (with immense gratitude) to those with more sober time than me, they taught me skills and gave incredible insight. Please stick it out on here - with people who have similiar numbers we can commiserate, relate easier and develop accountability Buddies, with those to have more time up their sleeve, we can learn so much insight and knowledge. And knowledge is power 
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Yeah, I know. Losers group came to me when I was consuming and feeling down. Day One sounds better!