Today will be day 7 not drinking and I’m somehow thrilled and super frustrated all at once. I was foolishly thinking it would be a little easier to resist the cravings by now. I’ve been taking some medications to assist with the urges and it’s allowed for my current success. But I guess I feel weak because I’ve had to lean so heavily on those meds.
I’d really like to find a sponsor, I feel this would help even beyond my therapist. I have a fairly prominent position in a small community so I’ve had a hard time finding a safe AA group to attend. For others in that kind of position, how have you find the help and support you need?
Good for you @BowieBell! I understand the feeling weak - I’ve been there - but ultimately everyone learns to walk (and eventually run) first by crawling. How do toddlers take their first steps? By bracing themselves against the couch, the coffee table, or another support they hold on to. Does that make them weak? Heck no.
I have several virtual SA groups I participate in. Most of my meetings with my sponsor are virtual meetings or phone calls. He is in the same city as me, but that is just a coincidence; it could just as easily have been in any other city worldwide (I didn’t plan on having a sponsor in my city).
Virtual and telephone sponsorship works very well for me. Do you think it might be worth a try?
I would like to encourage you to download meeting guide. Here is a link to Android Google app meeting guide it has a picture of a empty chair with a blue icon.
This is what I use because you are able to go in. You can select in-person meetings or online meetings and you can use zoom to connect with a group of AA members enjoying virtual meeting instead of going to in person meeting. This is where I spend most of my time as well. Is in these virtual meetings seeking the knowledge that I need. I am not new to AA. I was sober for 2 years then I got back on the wagon again. But today I am sober and I am grateful for that. I am 9 days sober. I hope that this will help check out the app because you can set it for near you and it will find in person and online virtual meetings. Keep your head high and keep coming back. That’s what always worked for me. Hope this helps. God bless, Brian D. Or Gator D
Personally, I was on MAT meds, too, and, initially, I felt ashamed about it (especially 'cause there are people who think people on them are still using) but I had to decide what was best for me. Naysayers be damned.
I was also blessed with an Outpatient Counselor who helped me to understand that my program is my program…no one else’s (and others should worry about themselves).
I also learned to give myself a break, be kind to myself and forgive myself.
I am no longer on MAT meds but they were invaluable for me; I could very well be dead if I hadn’t had them.
As for meetings, I think Zoom meetings would be a good start but, in my opinion, there is no substitute for in-person meetings.
I remain focused on keeping my program simple; remaining honest, open-minded, and willing; and doing what is best for me. I am only 508 days into my recovery journey and have already reaped amazing rewards from what I’ve done so far.
Hi, congrats on reaching one week. I live in a rural area where there is lots of gossip so I had to travel 40 minutes to reach a town where I could join a meeting. It was a Refuge Recovery group. Six years ago. That lasted a year, but then it closed down . And I relapsed many many times after that. I tried counseling. Still relapsed. I read lots of quit lit. I really liked Belle Robertson s Tired of Thinking about Drinking website and got into the 100 day sober challenge. That was two years ago.
I also liked the no nonsense approach of Craig Becks Alcohol Lied To Me. But I continued to struggle until I found TS and reached out for help. And I got it , cuz there is strength in numbers. There is support when you need it and opportunity to support others when you can.
I visit every day. I check in daily for accountability. I read a lot of various posts in several threads.
And I keep reading. Most recently, Dr. Anna Lembke Dopamine Nation. It helps to truly understand the nature of addiction and how the brain gets retired and what to expect when you try to change the dynamic.
Expecting cravings to subside in such a short time isn’t realistic. It takes longer than that for the wolfie voice in your head to shut up and leave you alone! I remember very well in the initial few weeks of my journey, there were times when I’d break down and cry arguing with that voice,
I came to TS a LOT in these early days sometimes every hour, especially when surfing the urges was rough.
So keep going, keep reaching out. Connect right here, the door is open 24/7. Sending you strength and peace of mind!
@Pattycake may I please ask you to elaborate a bit on this please? “… the nature of addiction and how the brain gets retired and what to expect when you try to change the dynamic.” Thank you
Gosh, I have a typo there. Should read, “when the brain gets rewired”! Below is a link to the National Institute of Health article that can explain the process better than I can.
In her book, Dopamine Nation, Dr. Lembke describes the process in which our dopamine levels rise during periods of using whatever substance gets you temporary pleasure, then they crash afterward, leading to the let down… and that downswing leads us toward using again. It’s a fascinating read.
You do you
Every recovery is different, because we are all different and drank different
There is no one size fits all. Please use all help as offered. There is no weakness in here! It is already hard enough to become and stay sober.
I’m sober for a few years now with the help of this app and the people in it.
What has helped me was being here every day, learning about my addiction, meeting new peple here that where sober despite their addiction.
It’s so helpfull to learn from eachother. I tried all the tips I got. Some worked and some didn’t, but at the end I had a few things rhat really worked for me and still do.
I never was in AA and can’t tell you about a sponsor because I never had one.
Again: everyone has his own personal recovery. road
Congratulations with your 1 week sober!!
Yes, I meant TS. I did try joining Belle Robertson’s website, but you have to pay a subscription for more “personal” connection. Wasn’t always that way when she first started. But here’s a link to check out what she has on offer. https://www.tiredofthinkingaboutdrinking.com/
I do really like her sense of humor and direct approach. Just didn’t like the commerce part so much.
There are other sober coaches out there, not sure about fee structures though. Here at TS you can message people too.
Have you considered an online AA community? I’ll link one below where it’s extremely unlikely anyone from your small community would attend, let alone even know it exists. Many on that platform have found sponsors and have had success working the AA program, never attending in person meetings. What’s nice is you can just sit in the audience and get to know AA and the people before actually joining in to share.
