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āRUN THE DISHWASHER TWICE.ā
āWhen I was at one of my lowest (mental) points in life, I couldnāt get out of bed some days. I had no energy or motivation and was barely getting by.
I had therapy once per week, and on this particular week, I didnāt have much to ābringā to the session. He asked how my week was and I really had nothing to say.
āWhat are you struggling with?ā he asked.
I gestured around me and said āI dunno man. Life.ā
Not satisfied with my answer, he said āNo, what exactly are you worried about right now? What feels overwhelming? When you go home after this session, what issue will be staring at you?ā
I knew the answer, but it was so ridiculous that I didnāt want to say it. I wanted to have something more substantial. Something more profound. But I didnāt. So I told him,
āHonestly? The dishes. Itās stupid, I know, but the more I look at them the more I CANāT do them because Iāll have to scrub them before I put them in the dishwasher, because the dishwasher sucks, and I just canāt stand and scrub the dishes.ā
I felt like an idiot even saying it. What kind of grown woman is undone by a stack of dishes? There are people out there with actual problems, and Iām whining to my therapist about dishes? But my therapist nodded in understanding and then said:
āRUN THE DISHWASHER TWICE.ā
I began to tell him that youāre not supposed to, but he stopped me.
āWhy the hell arenāt you supposed to? If you donāt want to scrub the dishes and your dishwasher sucks, run it twice. Run it three times, who cares? Rules do not exist, so stop giving yourself rules.ā
It blew my mind in a way that I donāt think I can properly express.
That day, I went home and tossed my smelly dishes haphazardly into the dishwasher and ran it three times. I felt like I had conquered a dragon. The next day, I took a shower lying down. A few days later. I folded my laundry and put them wherever they fit. There were no longer arbitrary rules I had to follow, and it gave me the freedom to make accomplishments again.
Now that Iām in a healthier place, I rinse off my dishes and put them in the dishwasher properly. I shower standing up. I sort my laundry. But at a time when living was a struggle instead of a blessing, I learned an incredibly important lesson:
THERE ARE NO RULES. RUN THE DISHWASHER TWICE! ā
ā Credit ~ Kate Scott ā
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Ooof I feel that took a shower laying down comment. Iām glad Iām not currently there but I have been. š©¶š©·
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This is one of the most powerful things Iāve ever read 
Iām glad that Iām not alone in figuring out unconventional solutions when Iām struggling with life.
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A total down day, as they sometimes are. Was thinking of starting a new thread, then remembered this one, so had a look thru once again. I used to post and visit it often, not so much lately. Idkā¦sometimes I feel more connected to threadsā¦other times not so much. Lots of musings today with being in my head. Using my tools and all that. Down daysā¦not my faveā¦but gratefully no longer an excuse to drink. Life, physically aging, elderly parents, kids, blah blah blahā¦sometimes it hits all at once. Delving into the darkness that has always been with meā¦as I used to decades, literally decades agoā¦tho then lost so much time to the substancesā¦the knowledge is still there, the healing. The darkness offers opportunityā¦to unearth, to dig. Am I up to it? It feels like all I want to do these days, weeks, months is rest, rest and find calm and peace. Digging in the dirt. 
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Iām definitely with you in spirit today. I chose rest today and didnāt do much of anything but it was a conscious choice and I refused to feel any which way about it. I was just in it. The down-ness. And Iām finding it important to make space for it so that it doesnāt grip me as much overall - that can happen if I fight it too much. I hope you will listen to your body and mind and accept the need for rest at times. Pushing through it and digging deep is important but there is plenty of time for that, as well. 
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Maybe itās the full moon yesterday but I third the down day. Felt quite crippled with anxiety and depression today. Felt sorry for myself. Felt angry at the world and not being able to do what I wanna do and get away with it.
Tomorrow is another day, we go again.
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10101010
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4th here on that down day. Something in the water maybe.
These days we only get through it with kindness so let me assure each of you:
@SassyRocks
@RosaCanDo
@Tragicfarinelli
And @TrustyBird
I @ed myself because I need this too,
Weāve taken away our negative coping skills so we just get to feel this. Maybe its trying to tell us something, maybe it just needs attention. My plan is to get through work without crying and go home to watch something that stirs my blood up so I can feel something other than down. Moods are moods and this too shall pass. Sending each of you a hug, a sunbeam on your face in a cozy chair and a glass of iced tea with the perfect amount of ice. 
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Thank you for your honestly Sassy. Certainly makes me feel less alone in my similar feelings. - Thank you for the reference to the full moon @Tragicfarinelli , it was the first thing I thought of and always my go to when things feel off. Thank you @RosaCanDo for always having caring words - and thank you @TrustyBird for the reminder we are all here together and what a blessing that is. Itās so nice to know weāre not alone and certainly makes such a difference. We could start a new thread ā¦and call it ā¦ Howling at the Moon. Or Stargazers. Mostly, thank you all for making this a better night than it would have been had I not read these comments.
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Oh, I love this. Yes, the moon does have that pullā¦grateful for the reminder and not being alone in this.
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Thank you @SassyRocks, @RosaCanDo, @Tragicfarinelli @TrustyBird and @Laraellelarissa for making me feel not so alone during these down days. Every one of your posts were relatable. I was actually feeling guilty for resting and taking care of my mental health today, my only day off. Itās a rainy dreary day and I have zero motivation. I sat while my husband put away all the Christmas decorations and I didnāt offer to help one bit. But he didnāt work this past week and is full of energy so itās ok if I didnāt help (some self talk going on here). Now heās going food shopping and Iām going to continue to take care of me for a change, even if itās only resting and reading. Anyway, Iām just glad we have each other here on the forum thru the ups and downs.
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If we let that negative stuff eat us it will fester. Fester is my word of the day.
Talking about alcohol and ways that we struggle is the way through. Sending hugs and a good day of rest.
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