Might as well come clean....I drank

Well I had to reset. Made it almost 90 days. Longest I’ve had sober is 14 months. I have had cravings and made it through. The other day, the thought barely even crossed my mind and I acted immediately. A few days earlier a young man I know killed himself. No excuse for me to drink though. Anyway…not only did I drink but, I was messaging a friend buzzed and reminiscing about a time we went to a concert and thought…wow, that’s what I need to do…go to a concert sometime soon. I love music. It makes me happy so what did I do? I bought almost $1500 worth of concert tickets with my husband’s debit card. Nonrefundable I might add. So, here I sit on day 3 again. I didn’t stay drunk for days or anything. It was that one night but, it sucks starting over. Thank God I have an amazingly supportive husband. He just said “don’t stress yourself over it. That will just make you drink again. Just think about how much we will enjoy the concerts.” Who is that good? He’s way better than I deserve. So then he, more sternly, told me to call my sponsor and take my ass to a meeting and tell the truth. I know this was long but, it needed to be said. I’m not giving up, just sucks letting myself down after doing so well. Hope y’all are having a clean and sober day…

14 Likes

Oh no. Lesson learned! I’m almost to 70 days and constantly want to have a drink with friends. I’ve done the buy stuff drunk thing. Gave my family and friends huge Amazon gift cards. One thought I was going to kill myself because I was giving things away.

Stay strong.

Thanks so much. It sucks but, I refuse to wallow. I just have to get up, dust myself off and work even harder. I’m almost glad that I did something stupid while drinking. Had I not, I know me, I would have convinced myself that I drank successfully and that it would be okay to do it again and would have sucked me into that pit for months or years. All it did was reconfirm that I CANNOT drink EVER. It is detrimental to me and those I love. Thanks for your encouragement. Glad you are staying sober. Keep up the great work.

4 Likes

Thank you for sharing. And getting back to it with haste matters most right here.
ODAAT+

1 Like

What is it about milestones sometimes? Glad you learned something and your husband was stern and supportive. Good for you fetting right back on track. And you have some concerts to look forward to?