I’m curious if any of you are just trying to minimize drinking? That was my original goal, but since joining this community and hearing all of the success and clarity, I find myself with mixed feelings.
The way I see my life going, I don’t want to be slave to the notion of never having a drink again. I believe creating beers and spirits is art, and I truly appreciate it, I just want to have clarity in my life- which wasn’t possible at the rate I was going. I also enjoy the idea of instantly putting yourself in a different mindset and working through various concepts (I am really into philosophy and it’s interesting to see how ones mind processes ideologies differently through various routes, be it internal or external forces).
I decided to do 48 hours without drinking and then limit myself to 2 drinks when I want to drink. I have been successful with this strategy through being conscious of my mental states during the drinking process.
Question: Do you guys think, if I can maintain this level of drinking, I am going down the right path? I ask because I see most of the goals here are to never drink again and I’m curios what you guys think of my goals? I’m truly torn between completely stopping or simply being in control of my drinking. I am going to use these responses to make a final decision, I can’t talk to my friends because they didn’t even think I had a drinking problem…probably because they have one as well lol. Thanks in advance!
I personally can’t drink. I do it a day at a time because “never again” is overwelming. I’ve tested my drinking in all sorts of ways…moderating: drink only 2, drink only on weekends, drink only on Friday after work, etc. Then, drinking only beer, only clear mixed drinks, only brown drinks, etc. I’ve tried eating before hand, eating after, trying to stop at a certain time. It only worked temporarily. I’m an alcoholic (not just a heavy drinker) and that’s what I do. Once I make that choice and alcohol enters my body, the obsession takes over. I had to face my truth. You sound like you’re on the beam and need to experiment a little longer.
Since you asked for our opinions I’ll give you mine. I do not condemn you in any way, but this forum is called talking sober for a reason. 99% of us are addicts trying to recover from a disease/addiction that has made our lives worse. For some of us, it’s ruined parts of our life, destroyed relationships, caused health problems, ect. If you are not an alcoholic and can drink in moderation, then more power to you. I am an addict and cannot drink in moderation. My advice is to not use our responses in this case to influence how you live your life, but to look within yourself and decide if you have an addiction or just want to cut back on your intake. Once more, for most of us this is not an option and being sober 100% of the time is a way of life we are striving and struggling with daily to achieve.
I have made to decision to quit entirely if possible fingers crossed. With me if I start I’m not able to control it afterward I binge. So I couldn’t go that route. I’ve tried that in the past, but it just became a enabler. If you can control it I think any reduction is good. ( if you can control it. I can’t)
It looks like this forum isn’t what you were looking for. Obviously we are going to say not to drink at all. I tried the moderation thing and have ended up in detox 3 times and I’m in my early 20s. Yea it’s horrible thinking I can never drink again cuz im so young but it’s worth it to not be in such pain and having your family not trust you and being sick all the time. Countless bills keep coming in from the e.r. and outpatient stuff and catscans and Dr visits cuz I may have some problems with my stomach lining and inflammation in my pancreas. Alcohol isn’t worth it to me. I would hope none of us would tell you moderation is OK cuz it’s not and I would hope you would not tell another person on here it is OK either. My opinion
look am off heroin now and i know its totally different … but addiction is addiction … if i use heroin on a weekly or even 3 days basis i can still use it and be happy … but can i ? no … i could have … but now no … now im an addict … and the first thing an addict wanna do to quit is to really quit … not taper down … not moderate use … just quit
I guess that is entirely based how you feel, do you have control? For those of us legitimately addicted control is not an option. We can’t have two drinks. I used to think all I wanted was control, but in retrospect now that I have been alcohol-free for almost a month with no desire to drink life is entirely more fullfilling and purpose driven than ever before. But i’m also an addict. I guess the bigger question is what drew you this forum? Did you join because you think alcohol is something you don’t want in your life or is causing you discomfort? Or did you join out of curiosity sake to see what a sober recover community is like? MOST people don’t join a group like this is they think they don’t have a problem or don’t need help.
I am surprised at how difficult it has been to make it 5 days so far. I came over to the bar and ordered a beer with 0% ABV. I don’t know how to feel about it, but I know I’m not leaving here feeling stupid or waking up tomorrow to check my outgoing text messages for embarrassing statements.
Not sure if this is victory or failure, but having a “near beer” is getting rid of the craving so I’ll take it.
Agreed. Only you can make this decision, none of us can tell you if you have a problem. @Success You may not be at the point that you think you need help. Alcoholism is after all a progressive disease. It was many years before I got to this point. If you can moderate, good for you. I can not and I’m ready to say goodbye to alcohol forever.
I could never taper/minimize my drinking. Sure it worked for a day or 2 but then I would just go back to drinking like the full blown alcoholic I was.
Abstinence is the way to go. I lost track of that after 4 years of sobriety. I was so much happier sober than I ever was drinking.
Not sure of your plan, but don’t be afraid to seek medical advice if you need it
I can only think that there is a reason why you found this forum. You must have been feeling that alcohol was getting the better of you. Do you really think you can just minimize rather than quit?
I’m not sure it’s the easy way out. I think it’s going to be much harder than you think.
I guess we’re all here because we initially thought we could minimise our use, exert some form of control, have that Holy Grail of 2 occasional social drinks and then say ‘No more for me!’.
But we can’t.
If you can do that, great! As everyone else is saying, you are lucky, and I for one envy you that. But IF you can, with the best will in the world you won’t need this forum for much longer!
Thank you guys for all of your insights. I definitely let alcohol get the better of me for the last year but didn’t realize it until I lost some relationships, which is why I landed here. It’s an awesome community and it seems I have a great deal to think about!
I’m lucky enough to be given the opportunity to restore my health and quit before lose those most important. I’ve had my chances and tried to ignore or work around them. At the end of it all I lost and it seems to be a trend with many over time. Best thing is to drop it all together if you think it might be a issue.
Update: I knew the 0% ABV beer didn’t taste good, but I figured that was normal. Well it must’ve been old or something because a couple hours later I’m so sick from just the one. Fever and all, just really gross. Good news is I now have no reason to go back and try again.
@Success, I know a few people who have succeeded in starting to control and maintaining thier drinking… Only you know if you can’t stop… My daughter was a very heavy drinker but she managed to get down to 2 beers every so often. And it’s been 3 years… So it is possible… But for myself I drank to numb out and escape… I actually hate the taste and think a couple of drinks is a complete waste of time. Lol
Like I said only you know your addiction… Good luck… There is also alot of articles and research on the internet that explains it.