Mostly drinking home alone

Hi there, I’ve failed after 23 days last night. I’m not that heavy drinker but I really want to quit drinking alcohol as I feel bad the next day. I’ve been happily sober for 23 days but yesterday I had cravings all day and I finally gave in because I felt I just deserve a drink. So I bought only 2 cans of Bacardi coke and finished one and a half. I felt drunk didn’t sleep well and got up with a headache and all the rest of it. I’m so disappointed about myself. I’m so weak , can’t stay strong even if I’m talking to myself about the negative effects all the time. Problem is I usually drink home alone . And it’s difficult going out. I have a few friends but they are doing shifts as I do and they’ve got family and friends too. So I’m alone most of my spare time. Don’t get me wrong I’m usually fine on my own but sometimes it just sucks. Any advice how to just stay strong is appreciated. Thanks for listening!

After I quit drinking, I also was suddenly faced with a lot of alone time. Generally I like it because I have an intense job and I love the refuge of my home but at times it can be quiet and depressing. I try to get out of the house if a mood like that comes over me. I have found that pushing myself to go out for a long walk is very good therapy for me. Or to go to the gym. If it’s cold, I try to see a show or a movie. Trying to shake myself out of my head. Even just listening to music can shake me out of it. I also have two cats who cheer me up and are great companions and make me feel like I am never really alone. The funny thing I’ve found years into my sobriety, is that I get more regular social invites with friends now than I ever did when I was drinking. It didn’t happen right away but surprisingly changed over time.

You’ll be fine. You’re disappointed but not derailed. Pick yourself up and start again. You hit a small bump, but you’re back on the road.

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Today is a new day! I battled with cravings all day yesterday as well it was tough. Just kept changing my thoughts and would do something to keep busy, it can get frustrating when your battling all day . Keep thinking of all the reasons life is better without drinking

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I’d be an at-home drinker too. I’d recommend giving yourself a goal to help you beat 23 days and onwards. Research staying sober, make it your hobby, your thing. Make your home a drink-free zone. Having a drink as a treat isn’t as good as having 1 more extra day sober earned.

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My drinking was 99% at home. They say you might need to change some things in order to stay quit, and I thought well great – how am I supposed to change the fact of being at home when I’m at home!!

No matter what busyness I have to going on, I am going to end up back at home at the end of it, so then what???!!!

Aaaaaarrrrrghghgjgh!!!..

But it wasn’t so bad. I developed another habit. Crawling in bed with a treat and a book. It was my little private time to let down (you know – like what I thought drinking was). It wasn’t long before drinking was nowhere near my mind at night, but I still couldn’t wait for my spoil time.

And to be honest, such spoil time only makes sense if one is busy aaaaallll damn day. From rising to ending. So this may or may not make any sense.

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Thank you for supporting

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Yeah walking works for me usually too and I love my cat too. I feel like being back on path now. It’s a new day and every day is a new start. Thank you.

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Life is so much better without drinking. Thank you.

So true. I want my home a drink free zone. And I’ll try to keep myself busy.

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Makes perfectly sense to me. I should try to keep myself busy on my days off. Suffering Depression as well so sometimes it is just hard. But thanks to your replies I’m feeling stronger now. Big hugs to you all. Thank you

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Well to get right to it…you need to stop being alone!!! At least for me. Being alone allows me to drink without any limits. I still struggling with this. I’m at 32 days and I still can’t always be alone. You need to manage your time wisely. You can always check out some AA meetings or even looking into a outpatient program. My issues were I never liked to ask for help so I can totally understand but your here and trying…keep up the good work. We are here for you

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Thank you. Yeah I’m struggling with being on my own. But I’m here in a small town in Germany. No AA meetings around here as far as I know. But I’m going for a holiday next week with my best friend and she’s not drinking and we will be together 24/7 for a whole week… looking forward to it.

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Well, I can certainly relate to how you feel about being in a small town in Germany, since I’m in a small town in Switzerland! I also spend 95% of my time by myself, I even worked mostly at home, and certainly the vast majority of my drinking was DEFINITELY by myself. In fact, one of my early self-delusional aims was that I would “only drink when with others”… well, that didn’t work out too well, since I’m almost never with anyone else.
AA is not for everyone, I don’t think, and it certainly isn’t for me (having tried a couple of meetings). I found a really good book that was very helpful…
But solitude can be a tough thing… but alcohol doesn’t make it better.
Möchtest du lieber auf Deutsch schreiben ?

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Your concept is what I use daily. It’s got me through almost a year.

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Congratulations to almost a Year. That’s great

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You got knocked down but you got back up fighting. Give yourself credit for that. I know It’s disappointing but that feeling will pass soon enough an you will start feeling great again. When you next feel like having a drink remember this time an how it has made you feel. I keep the thoughts up front and centre of my bad times/hangovers to beat back the cravings when they crop up as well as distractions.

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Thank you!

Just checked out my first and only thread on here. How time flies.
I struggled a lot since the start of my journey. Made it to 30 days and failed again and then almost broke up. I never made it further then 10 days in any attempt after those 30 days. Felt almost hopeless . Then on a Sunday morning 3 weeks ago I woke up slightly hungover , sat on my patio, face turned to the morning sun and I suddenly knew this was it! I don’t need to drink anymore and I felt kind of confused but happy inside somehow. I’m not religious at all but this was an epiphany, an awakening , it was spiritual and it was amazing.
Sobriety still needs work and it’s not easy at all but everytime I feel myself slipping or being unsure about it I always remember that Sunday morning . And it works so far.
21 days gone and feeling good. Can t wait to be back on my 30 days.
Thank you all. Wouldn’t have come that far without this app and the support of you mates .
Thank you and have a beautiful sober day.

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Hi @happyfeet . I’m only a few days ahead of you (on 25 days now) after having been as high as four months. It really pissed me off that I had to reset, but then, I’m used to disappointing myself, so it wasn’t all that much of a shock. That being said, I’ve certainly realised that alcohol doesn’t add anything good to my life, and quite the opposite, in fact.
I’m certainly not religious either, but I can relate to the epiphany idea…
If this is your first visit to the site, then you haven’t yet had to listen to me harping on endlessly about a particular book, but here goes… by the way, I’m REALLY not the “joiner” type, so the idea of AA (even if there were meetings in my little corner of Europe) really isn’t for me.
Anyway, I suggest that you look for a book called Stop Drinking Now by Allen Carr. I bought the Kindle version for under 6 euros, so certainly no grea expense, and it has helped me quite a bit. The central idea of the book is that doing without alcohol doesn’t mean depriving yourself of anything, but rather freeing yourself from years of propaganda and lies… there’s more to it, but that’s pretty central.
In any event, I wish you well, and I would suggest that you visit this site regularly. I have found that that is also a big help.

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