I’m new to this. I just wanted to share a little about my experience, and hopefully give others hope. I began my love affair with alcohol at a very young age. I was fun and had a great time partying. As time went by and I got older, things took a turn for the worse. By the age of 30
I couldn’t take a sober breath for years and years. If I was awake I was drinking. Mine was whiskey. I loved to drink alone and I loved to start drinking first thing in the morning. I was a very angry and violent drunk. A year ago on the night of February 3rd, I was so deeply alone, lost, broken, and my soul was in shambles and utter darkness. The only way I knew how to escape at the time was to take my own life. I got one of my guns out of my closet, Sat down on my floor, started crying, and I said out loud “I can’t do this anymore”
I made sure the the safety was off, put the gun to the right side of my head and pulled the trigger. Everything went black. I was woken up the morning of February 4th by doctors in the ICU. For some reason that I will never understand, that bullet didn’t make it through my skull. They did have to pull the bullet fragments out and staple the right side of my head back together. Spent a couple weeks in the ICU then I was sent to a psych ward. There was so much damage done to the right side of my head just from the impact of the gun. I had to learn how to walk on my right side again. I couldn’t really eat much because it hurt to open my jaw. I had a hard time forming normal sentences. I still have memory problems.
I was lucky enough to be in the ICU while going through withdrawals. I’ve been sober since I woke up in the ICU. It wasn’t my plan to stay sober or even alive when I left the psych ward, but god or whatever you want to call it intervened in my life. Strange things that were not a coincidence happened in my life when I came home from the psych ward that kept alcohol out of my reach. All the sudden I had a sponsor and she took me to meetings. I’ve been sober since I woke up in the ICU. I’m still alive and sober. My life is so much better today. I have been sober 1 year and 4 months. I am a suicide survivor. I was diagnosed with severe depressive disorder, PTSD, and severe alcohol disorder. I never ever want anyone to feel the way I felt the night I almost lost my life. Anyone who reads this and is struggling, please reach out. There is hope, a better way of life, and a new future.
I am so glad you are here and so glad you survived. 
Congratulations on your 1 year and 4 months and new life! You must be a very strong person. 
Thank you so much for sharing this. A very powerful story that shows how are darkest moments can lead to hope and a better life.
Wow, just wow. What a powerful testimony. I can relate to feeling like ending it all is the answer but the powers out there in the universe decide that your time wasnt up. Id suggest looking into EMDR therapy for the PTSD. Done right, it did wonders for me. Sending love your way. Thank you for sharing!
You are sooo lucky. It wasnt ur time and u have a greater purpose here on earth to help others who are struggling with sucidial thoughts. I have never tried to commit suicide tbh but I have had many suicidal thoughts. Even though i didnt necessarily try to commit suicide, i was very reckless in how i lived my life and couldnt have cared less if i had died. I lost everything including myself. I have come very close to death numerous times and from a variety of ways, amd have been in situations where i could have potantially gone missing (and killed) if i didnt fight back and I often wondered why I was spared yet my friends have passed on or have gone missing. Like why am I still alive when I shouldve been dead? I am very grateful ur here. We each have a story to share that can help another person in some way. I’m glad u shared urs. I hear the pain and the sadness and desperation in ur words. But it has changed ur life and here u are, sober and well and being of service. Nice to have u here 
Powerful story.
You’ve got a lot of living left to do, and seems like your best years are still to come.
Go well
congratulations on your sober days.
Thank you for sharing this.
I am so glad that you are on the road to recovery.
I know there are people reading this who it will save, and let them see they can come out the other side with the right help.
I’m so glad your here, i am so glad to read you are doing okay. Thank you for sharing your story it’s so powerful, and that you want to show others there is help and light at the end of the tunnel.
You are blessed. 
Thank you for sharing your story and I’m so glad you are still here with us! Part of the reasons I won’t own firearms is because I know how I can feel in my addiction and I’m not sure what I’m capable of. I hope none of us ever have to feel the emotional or physical pain you did that night.
Congrats on your clean time!
What a story! Glad you are still alive to share it.
Thank you 
Congratulations with your recovery time! 
Welcome to the forum. Thank you for sharing your amazing story and congratulations on your 1 year and 4 months.
SOOO glad you are here. I’m sorry you were in so much pain. Happy you are on your way to a beautiful, better life, alcohol free A year and 4 months is a great accomplishment. You should be proud. I’m sure the road has not been an easy one.
Such a powerful story, thank you for sharing it with us 
so glad you’re still here today, sober and finally being able to LIVE life 
Welcome! I’m glad your here!
Thank you for sharing your story, yesterday 6/26/2022, I celebrated 23 years of sobriety, my story is very similar to yours in the sense that when I got here I wanted to die. I didn’t think I had a drinking problem, but my Father begged me to get help, so I did.
I just wanted to let you know that for me this journey has been full of incredible miracles and painful experiences. I have a wonderful group of friends that I surround myself with through all it! I am incredibly grateful for every day that I choose not to drink or use!
Please know that you are never alone.
Great story, I’m sorry you had to get to that point. However you took a low point in your life and turned it into a positive. If this inst proof that a higher power exists then I dont know what is. Plenty of people experience things like this and it destroys them. If only everyone who was given a second chance at life would put forth the effort to not waste that 2nd chance.
What a powerful story! God bless you! This is a great community here; a great resource too.
Welcome. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I’m so glad you’re here. 
You are an inspiration! Thank you so much for sharing your story. This must be what I needed to hear at this very moment. Thanks again from the bottom of my heart!