I would only drink till I got my buzz, then stop till it went down, repeat.
I was always straight enough to care for my babe’s/cook/clean/be a wife to be(I lost a babe back in '13, there is a block in me that would never let me go over that line, even when they where having a sleepover at my mother’s, I have this deep fear, I may loss enough babe so I can’t pass the line).
Went I say heavily, I mean I could bring two bottles of Jack in a day, and still walk straight/fine as can be. < < < That was my first wake up call, no one should be able to do that. 
️.
The most worse thing in this world you can hear/see is your babe is died.
In my case I was told when he was still in me.
My ex husband beat me so bad one night, he killed our unborn son.
My son was a miscarriage babe born on 04-18-13!
This talk is getting a bit deep, I am going to pull back with it, I am not ready for my story to fully be out in the air/on here, I feel a bit naked right now.
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Thank you for the input/help!
I just need a break, no one fully knows my story, saying all this out loud is a big step for me.
I just do not want to be judged when I am already feeling so down.
I know I made mistakes, I do not need or want to relive them each day.
I hope you understand.
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Absolutely understand! Set your own pace for sure! You’re letting yourself move fwd, n it can be so very overwhelming. High 5 on setting limits. Helps peeps, especially me, temper replies. Hugs from Alabama.
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Oh my blanking word, I would be in prison for killing a Low Life for even looking at my daughter’s.
I know his friend, he isn’t that kind of person.
I was talking about the bathroom, cups, blanket, etc stuff.
My girls life’s are not going to be over because of this guy.
Nor are they going to catch lice/have bed bugs bite them because he brings them back from his “dates”.
I feel so sick to my stomach now.
No real mother, doesn’t matter how much they drank/used would ever let that happen.
If they did, I would be the first one to make sure they got everything that should come to them.
!
Do you have kids?
Then you should already now where I am coming from.
I do not know what he has and am not changing anything.
Crabs, HIV, herpe out breaks, etc.
I know the whole bathroom thing is more unlikely then likely, I am not stupid, I just do not mess when it comes to my babe’s.
I am sure you are the same way when it comes to your babe('s).
That is a lie.
You can.
You just have to have a cut and jump on the pot in the small window there is to pass it before it dies.
Well, I am glad.
I find it very sad when babe’s catch what there mother’s have.
An old friend of mine and her brother both are HIV + because of their mother.
I do not talk to her anymore, I couldn’t take anymore of her lies.
He isn’t my husband.
Been there too!! Do you go to meetings or have a sponsor for your journey??
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No but I think it would help me out a lot.
Aa.org = Find a meeting, select the state/city/day and JUST GO!!!
Don’t worry about being late, not knowing what to expect, etc…Everyone is SOOOO understanding and loving!!
Then in the meeting sponsors raise their hands to those that want to connect after the meeting. Even if the sponsor is temporary till you find “the right fit”!!
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