This will be my first sober weekend in … 19 years? And I’m nervous about it. There will be temptation. I am already practicing ordering Pellegrino instead of wine, and I made a date for coffee and a stroll with a friend for Saturday morning. Planning to spend time at the gym. But I’m worried about how easy it would be to say yes to just one glass of wine (it’s never just one). Just sharing, and appreciate this forum and the support!
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Are you going somewhere? I pretty much avoided any place where I would be in that situation early on. I always drank at home, but I didn’t want to risk anything in a social setting like a bar or whatever.
If you absolutely can’t skip, just have something in your hands at all times. LaCroix, water, soda.
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Do you have to go out? I enjoyed hibernating when I was in my early days, weeks and months. Took long walks or bike rides, read, watched movies, baked, long baths, yoga…anything to keep me from drinking. I avoided get togethers, dinner parties, dinner out, etc. I just wanted to build some up some confidence in being sober and saying no thank you. It helped me a lot. I am retired and live in Florida, so every day can be a beach and cocktail day if you let it. Learning how to care for myself, without booze has been key for me.
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If you absolutely have to go out, will someone who knows you are getting sober be there? It was always helpful for me to have some accountability and someone who could help take attention from me if needed. Even now, I sometimes disappear into a restaurant ladies’ room to text or call a sober friend if I need a quick check in. Don’t hesitate to reach out here if you need to.
Your mantra shall be, "I will not drink, no matter what.. Do whatever you have to do not to take that first drink.
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You have made up your mind to stop, so stop. You can still have some fun albeit different to drunken fun, which is fun but with dire consequences. Dont worry what others think about you not drinking, all they actually care about is their own glass being filled and drained. Comments will be made about how they enjoy a drink but they of course never over do it or so they think. They will ask you if you have a problem, which you dont as you are not drinking. Remember most problems in friendships start with a booze related incident.
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For the first weekend I highly recommend not going anywhere where ordering is taking place. Stay home as much as you can. Go to the gym (as long as there is no bar there too…yes I used to go to a gym and then celebrate with beers in the upstairs bar!!). Coffee is good too but go to coffee and the straight home!!
Keep checking in here and let us know if you are feeling tempted.
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I stayed home the first two weeks… focused on physical recovery… nourishing and hydrating my body, rest and exercise. This would be a good time to look up threads and make a plan, so you better succeed at this. For the weekends… there are threads you can be apart of if you’re needing fun, sober company.
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I think you should have an escape plan. If you are feeling like it’s taking over you then make an excuse and leave. Stomach ache, headache etc. I think this would be much easier than trying to get through the night while the head gradually wears you down.
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I’m still fresh in recovery and avoid places with alcohol and pot like the plague. I know eventually I can attend places that serve alcohol, but in the meantime I’m educating myself about addiction and hanging out with new sober women. Be careful.
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Thanks for this! I will definitely follow these threads for weekend support.
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As has already been said I stayed away and still stay away from all temptation.
If you really want sobriety then nothing should change your mindset. Not saying it’s easy by a longshot. But just keep saying to yourself I’m not drinking!
One minute, one hour, one day at a time.
This is your journey no one else’s.
Stay strong!
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What everyone else said. Plus, make sure you eat plenty. You’ll be less likely to crave a drink if you have a full stomach. Stuck with it.
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