New and need to check in

Hello :wave:
I feel the need to check in with someone. I’ve tried Direct Line and they’ve directed me to a number for an Intake for counselling, but theyre not open until Monday. It feels like a long time to wait when I feel like I am so lost and losing control.

I have been struggling with alcohol since I was 15, I am now 36. I have what feels like a million day ones. I hate letting everyone down. Husband, kids, doing embarrassing and stupid things that i cannot remember half of the time. I just want to cry.

6 Likes

Welcome :slightly_smiling_face:. I struggled just like you and came here as well. This place has helped save my life. Have a look around and ask any questions you have.

Welcome to Talking Sober! 2023 update!

Resources for our recovery

2 Likes

Thanks so much, reading through all of it now. So much helpful information

2 Likes

Hello! I’m here. My name is Emilie and I drank 20 plus years. I did plenty of disappointing. Now I’m a year plus sober and it is because I reached out for help on a day one just like you are doing.

What’s your plan?

2 Likes

:wave: That’s amazing. I would love to be able to say the same thing one day.

So far my plan is to get in touch with a counsellor, I have used one before which helped enormously, I got to 90 days. But she went on leave and I never followed up with another one. So I will start there again.

My husband drinks as well, so there is always alcohol around. I have tried to get him to hide it and lock it up, which he does for a short period of time but then he forgets :sweat:

3 Likes

You can say that someday too.
Good plans so far. Counseling really helped me uncover some deep stuff that was keeping me sick. And anyone who wants therapy should absolutely have it.
My early days were tough. I made it my goal to put a sober head on a pillow every night. That was the main focus. If that got too hard and I thought I would slip I came on here and told someone. There were many days I needed someone to tell me why I shouldn’t drink.

I am sober but my husband is also still a drinker. It can be done. You have to focus on yourself here. His drinking is his, your sobriety is yours. My husband is proud of me for where I am but there are nights where he drinks too much and I get annoyed by his drunk behavior. The key here for me is to use these moments of his bad behavior to re-affirm why I don’t drink.

Welcome aboard. I’m happy you’re here. Reach out anytime.

2 Likes

Hi and welcome here,
Congratulations with saying enough is enough.
You sound determinated and that and some extra help is all you need. Glad you found us here because we can’t do it by ourselves alone.
Almost 5 years ago I came here. Went sober 2 weeks later and still am.
What has helped me a lot was being here every day to read and check in sober. It helped me to stay focussed.
Yes, it’s difficult when your husband is still drinking and forgets to hide it from you. But you are responsible for your sobriaty. So you have to say no to your addictive inner voice.
Difficult, but you can do it. Make a list of all the stuff you hate about the drinking.
When you think you can have “just one” read that paper.
Here on the forum you will find many other tips, it will help you a lot.
If you have questions, just ask them! There is always someone around to help.

See you around :raising_hand_woman:

2 Likes

I think I will aim for the same, I like that goal. Having a sober head on my pillow at the end of the day. And I feel the same, whwn he drinks, it annoys me and it can remind me of why I dont want to drink as well which can work for a few days. But then I slip up again.

2 Likes

Very true. Great idea about the paper. Definitely going to do that. I’m glad I found this app. It’s making me feel a little less alone.

2 Likes

I had a few near misses but the longer I stay away from alcohol the less I miss it. When I want a drink (because it’s always just one) I mentally walk myself through my bender. Picture the first drink all the way through to the horrible hangover. It’s a very effective tool once you get the hang of it. The promises of that one drink is a powerful liar. The knowledge that one drink is never just one is a game changer.

3 Likes

Definitely. Some days I can talk myself out of it by saying one is never enough. I hope to be strong enough to do that daily.

2 Likes

Practice. The more you flex those sober muscles the stronger they get.

2 Likes

Love this!!!

2 Likes

It’s true. Look for the hope in it. I’m signing off for the night. Welcome again!

2 Likes

Love this I’m on day 11, the more I read the more helpful info I get and ways to help with cravings and emotions, this app is brilliant stay on here for sure it’s helping me immensely, I was in a very dark place 11 days ago, there is light, strength sent :muscle:

4 Likes

Hang in there, Bjohns I am once again at day one after caving and sneaking a couple drinks yesterday afternoon. This is the familiar cycle of starting and stopping over and over . The wolfie voice in our head that says it’s ok to drink, but we know it isn’t!! But Wolfie is sooo sneaky and clever, the wily bastard.

1 Like