I’m new to the community part of this app. I am an alcoholic from early on. I was able to walk away from it for a little over a decade. '03-'14 or 15. We decided to enjoy a drink once the kids got home for the night on Friday and Saturday evenings. Then COVID hit and it turns into an every single day thing. My wife walked away from it on 7/4/23 and has not looked back. That is when I really started trying 2 day, 4 days etc, then I slipped back up and went every day again. Over the last few months my streaks have jumped to the 14-18 day range. Then I decided to go for it and today I hit 28 days and then went down to the liquor store. I don’t want this anymore, I am ready to hit 100, 1000, etc days sober. I have 3 grandkids and one on the way, I still have a child at home as well. I need to be held accountable.
Welcome, Chris
The community on this app has helped me tremendously. I’m almost at 100 days sober and have no desire to turn back.
I know it’s a battle, but it sounds like you really want this.
I look forward to seeing you post on here!
It’s a good place to start for accountability.
Welcome to TS, @CH1978, and great job for reaching out!
I know and understand you are looking to be held accountable, by this community and maybe your family. While family is an excellent motivator to get started on your sober journey, my experience is that lasting sobriety only happens when one finds the reason for wanting to be sober for oneself. Maybe you can work on changing your thinking from “my wife/family/community needs me to be sober because…” to “I want/need to be sober because…”?
Once you have found your own reason(s) to want to be better to yourself, you will be less dependent on external accountability and be all the stronger for it when tough times do hit. Makes sense?
This reminds me of something I’ve been delving into in my sobriety.
From the stoic point of view:
“Stoics want to be self sufficient. Untouchable by the twists and turns of fate.
If you’re miserable, stoics would advise you to stop blaming external factors for your emotional state.”
According to Aristotle, pain rather than pleasure drives moral progress.
I agree with what you said about finding reasoning within rather than an external one.
And I personally think it’s important for us to lean into our discomfort and pain in the process of recovery.