I’m new here, just hit my 10th day sober and I’m starting to get really agitated in the evenings. I hit rock bottom two weeks ago and woke up knowing I had to make a change before I lost my family, ruined my career but most importantly I have to do it for me. My credibility has resentful went down at work as it’s finally came to light the excess of my drinking, I’m in the army which is a massive drinking culture so hopefully I can recover from it. I just read a book called the unexpected joy of being sober which got me through the last week, I thought it was great and really gave me a lot of insight. I have my first AA meeting on Friday which is a bit daunting. How did you guys go about not drinking in crowds? Just be completely open about why?
The agitation at night is pretty common, stopping drinking means breaking old habits and starting new ones… I found that changing up my routine and keeping myself busy really helped. Over time it does get easier to manage.
I spent alot of nights here on the forum, going for a run or long walk, finding new hobbies and also started AA meetings. I went primarily at night because that’s when I struggled the most and they helped keep me on the right path.
As for not drinking in crowds… when I first stopped drinking, I changed alot of who’s and where’s. I distanced myself from people who were drinking and avoided alcohol fuelled places until I felt stronger in my recovery.
If someone asks why I’m not drinking, there’s a multitude of answers you can give but ultimately people don’t need to know everything about me.
It also depends how well I know them. I am honest with the people closest to me as they can give support. Other people, I just say I’m not drinking tonight / I’m taking a break / I don’t drink. You only need to tell people what you’re comfortable in saying.
Welcome to the forum, there’s alot of helpful support to be found here
Oh forgot to add,because you enjoyed the unexpected joy of being sober, if you’d like to read more quit lit, the below link has alot of suggestions/recommendations.
Thanks becsta, I guess you could say I’m going through an experimental stage atm finding what works and what doesn’t… I’ve found going for a hard run helps a lot ( my miles on Strava have went through the roof the past week ). Thanks for the link, I’ll need a secret book shelf to keep all the sobriety books .
Hi Aidrian, welcome to the forum. This place is the reason I manage to stay sober. Use this forum, lean on us. Having such amazing support and advice available 24/7 is such a blessing. Get yourself a hobby or something new to do in the evening. In the early days I cleaned a lot! I moved my furniture around in my house so that the original pattern of sitting drinking in the usual chair in the usual room wasn’t an option. I read a lot also, there are some awesome quit-lit books out there. Thank the lord for kindle lol. I wish you well on your journey and it’s lovely to meet you. Remember…. Nothing changes if nothing changes! (Someone on here said this to me at the start of my journey and it resonated so deep with me) bless you
Haha yes running is a great stress release for me too and the endorphin kick from exercising is a bonus!
I understand going to a meeting for the first time is daunting… from memory I quietly snuck in to the back of the room just on starting time and snuck out 5 minutes before finishing time alot of support to be found in those rooms though, keep us posted on how it goes x
Hey Becsta, still going strong thanks, hit my 2 weeks tomorrow. The AA meeting was helpful but as you did I kinda just slid in and hid in a corner and quietly slipped out with out talking to anybody , I will defo go again all the same and hopefully feel less uncomfortable next time
I sat in the back staring at my shoes my first few meetings. Didn’t want to talk. Didn’t want to look at anyone. Frankly, didn’t even want to be there lol. Have never regretted sitting there uncomfortable and out of place though. That was the start of this beautiful journey of recovery. I’m glad you plan to go back.
Oh such great news! Give yourself a big pat on the back because taking that step can be so daunting and you did it! For what its worth I’m proud of you!
I was taught that it is a very bad idea to be anywhere near alcohol when you are first getting sober. No weddings, wine fueled dinners, or partys etc. And certainly never have any alcohol in the house. Eventually over the months and years, you will likely become strong enough to start going to such events, but until you have atleast like 6 months under your belt, you should avoid them entirly, and even then you should be extremely careful, only going to places where alcohol plays a small role, like a dinner where most people arent even drinking. And you should bring someone with you who is willing to leave with you if you start to get cravings. Eventually though, you will probably become strong enough where it isnt a problem, i for one after a year of sobrity have not tested it, only going to a few dinners where most people arent even drinking.
). Thanks for the link, I’ll need a secret book shelf to keep all the sobriety books 
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