I’ve been sober since September 1 of this year and at first I didn’t really morn the loss, but suddenly it’s just been more apparently how much I am resenting being sober.
It seems like I can’t even have fun without being reminded that I’m sober and that it’s so dang hard to resist.
I have a lot of support from my pals and all, but not a sober community to fall back on when I need commiseration. I’ve tried going to SMART recovery but with it being virtual I find it hard to connect.
Right now, being sober just feels so useless and I want to just give in and give up. I feel so hopeless. It’s like I’m miserable when I drink and I’m miserable when I dont…so why don’t I just drink…ugh.
I know exaCTLY what you mean! I felt that and it is like grieving an old friend.
It’s normal and you’ll feel better when it passes.
Think of your life getting better without it; I can’t imagine going back to it now.
Hang in there,
I went through the same thing I just want to tell you that it’s normal and it gets better. The longer you stay sober the less miserable you’ll feel as you start to pick up other hobbies and find your new normal. Some days are still miserable but I think it’s like that for people without addictions too sometimes life just sucks. But just hang in there because as time passes it will get better! The first few months are the hardest
That is a long time, good job. I think you have to hate alcohol and everything it has done to you. It is evil and has no place in society. Islam is right about alcohol, it is from Shaitan. Christians are still struggling to figure out what is even sin in these days.
Kick ass on your days sober! That feeling you described… so do remember it too. At about my 7 month I finally accepted my disease & situation. If we didn’t have the health, financial, employment, family and everything problems with getting high & drunk, we’d all damn near be still doing it. But, it just doesn’t work that way.
Stick with us, you will be healthier and happier if you do.
Hi Hutch, and it’s fantastic you’re coming up on 4 months sober! The most ubiquitous sober community I know is AA - it’s all around, always available, and always welcoming. You get to declare yourself a member, there’s no minimum belief test or anything. I have yet to find a replacement for it - even the virtual meetings were strictly a band-aid for me and I returned to f2f meetings as soon as I could.
Yeah, I remember things kind of sucking early on in sobriety.
For me though what I resent is the amount of years I wasted getting wasted. The opportunities I missed. The money I flushed away. The number of times I made an unimaginable ass of myself when I was drunk. The dangerous situations I put myself in. The lack of respect I had for myself when I was drinking. I resent the time I lost sitting in dark bars waiting to black out.
I am so damn glad I got sober.
It takes some time to get your sober sea-legs. Without alcohol, you have to look elsewhere for ways to celebrate and commiserate and deal with stress. When you’re sober you can’t just pour poison down your throat to erase your worries and anxiety. You have to learn how to deal with it all without escape.
For me, it’s worth it. You’re on your way. Don’t throw it out now.
Definitely a huge congratulations on making it past 100 days! I appreciate your honesty. And welcome!
My experience has been a different than others that have shared so far. My cravings didn’t automatically go away with extended sobriety. In fact, they got worse. For example, last year, I broke 293 days of sobriety after craving the vast majority of those days. And I don’t believe it was a coincidence that I used just a week before celebrating a 300 day milestone.
I finally switched methods… Again. Instead of solely focusing on building value on a new sober life which is good. That’s still important. I decided to pay close attention to the other unknown variable in the equation. That is the exorbitantly high amount of value that I was placing on my DOC.
A good resource that discusses this is The Easy Way to Control Alcohol by Allen Carr.
There are other facets to my recovery, but EasyWay happens to be major foundation of my path now.
The truth is that my drug has no value. It’s completely worthless. It’s worth the same amount as a piece of moldy bread. Once I realized that, choosing sobriety was easy. The cravings stopped.
I agree, one cannot use will power as it is likely to fail at some point. If you see alcohol as something positive then its harder to give up. The truth is its extremely harmful to those whom abuse it. Once you realise how much better off you qre without it, being sober is easy. In fact life is way easier being sober.
Hey there Hutch!
I see you have that as a first name. Mine and my brother have it as a last name and nick name. We are also both sober.
Hope you are still sober also!
Sharon
(Gavin is brother also on here.)
